Meet the Governator, and much more fun stuff

Where better to start than with easily the funniest thing I found in my morning reading? I suppose when you're Arnold Schwarzenegger, your life has pretty much been a comic book from the start, so why not make it official?

It seems the former governor of California has teamed up with Stan Lee to turn his nickname, the Governator, into a new comic book and animated series. Yes, really.

Here's what Lee had to say about it to Entertainment Weekly: "The Governator is going to be a great superhero, but he’ll also be Arnold Schwarzenegger. We’re using all the personal elements of Arnold’s life. We’re using his wife [Maria Shriver]. We’re using his kids. We’re using the fact that he used to be governor. Only after he leaves the governor’s office, Arnold decides to become a crime fighter and builds a secret high-tech crime-fighting center under his house in Brentwood."

I really can't see myself buying this, but just to show that I'll probably never get too old to buy an occasional comic book or two, I did pony up the other day for a copy of Kick-Ass 2 #1, which should be coming in the mail any day now.


Am I the only person who looked at that photo above and first thought, "separated at birth"? In the second funniest thing I found this morning, and in something that shouldn't tax his acting skills much at all, it seems that John Travolta will be playing John Gotti Sr. in a new movie called "Gotti: Three Generations," to be directed by Nick Cassavetes.

The movie will focus on the relationship between John Gotti Sr., the head of the Gambino crime family who died in prison in 2002, and his son John Gotti Jr., who took over the family business for his father, served time in prison, but then successfully escaped conviction in four subsequent racketeering trials. But really, I just wanted to post that picture, so that's all I really have to say on the subject.

Moving on, if FX is ever going to have any successful dramas, it could certainly do worse than signing the first family of "Friday Night Lights," my favorite TV drama of the last 10 years or so (yes, better than "Mad Men").

Connie Britton has apparently already signed on for something from "Glee" creator Ryan Murphy to be called "American Horror Story." I have no idea what it's about, but keep an eye out for it on FX's fall schedule.

And now, it seems that FX is courting Coach Taylor too, for a different series called "Powers." Kyle Chandler hasn't signed on yet, but if he does, it would be for something that sounds potentially pretty great.

Based on the graphic novel by Brian Michael Bendis and Michael Avon Oeming, "Powers" will be a police procedural set in a world where superpowers are relatively common. It centers on two detectives, Christian Walker and Deena Pilgrim, in a homicide department that deals with cases involving "powers." (people with superpowers).

Look for supernatural police forces to appear in some form in at least two other shows coming this fall, because of course no idea these days comes about in a vacuum, but if Chandler signs on for "Powers," you can bet that's the only one I'll be tuning in for when it most likely premieres in early 2012.

OK, to wrap up with the TV segment, at least until we get to the videos, how better to start a Thursday morning than with a photo of Amber Heard in a Playboy bunny suit? I can't think of too many.

She's starring in the fall NBC series "The Playboy Club," which she's described to Comingsoon.net as "a crime drama centered around the Playboy clubs of Chicago in the 1960s." I'm not sure that's enough to get me to tune in for the whole series, but I think I'll at least give the pilot a try this fall. Here's the photo:


OK, now on to the videos, and where better to start than with Jim Henson? This new site is dedicated to his history, and it's well worth a visit. Among the gems you'll find there is this short pilot of sorts he did in 1968 - before either "Sesame Street" or "The Muppet Show"- for a potential TV series based on the Wizard of Id comic strip. Nothing came of it, of course, but the clip is a lot of fun, and you'll certainly recognize the voices. Enjoy.



Can you ever possibly bring together too much funny? I doubt it, but HBO is testing that theory with its upcoming special "Talking Funny," which will rather amazingly make Jerry Seinfeld the least funny guy in the room. Not an insult really, just my personal opinion that Ricky Gervais, Chris Rock and the great Louis C.K. are all funnier than he is. Anyways, the four of them will be getting together for this "casual conversation" that should certainly be a hoot when it airs April 22 at 9 p.m. EST on HBO, and keep an eye out for the second season of C.K.'s rather sublime "Louie" series coming to FX in June. Enjoy the "Talking Funny" trailer.



And finally today, color me jealous of all you folk who get BBC America, which my cable provider charges too much for me pony up for. Coming to the network starting April 23 will be the new season of "Doctor Who," and based both on the very entertaining Christmas special and this latest trailer, it looks like a wildly fun ride. Enjoy the trailer, and have a perfectly pleasant Thursday. Play ball!

Please, please, please just say no to Jay Leno

Before I go any further, I just wanted to thank Kanye West for finally proving to the world just how much of an ass he is. Not that it really matters to me, since I've thought that much of him since he was obviously the only person who had no fun at "Dave Chappelle's Block Party," but I am glad the proverbial cat is completely out of the bag now.

But I didn't tune in for much else of MTV's Video Music Awards last night because, first of all, I'm obviously far too old, and more importantly because last night was just such an epicly good night of television in other places.

First up at my house came the two-episode finale-of-sorts for "King of the Hill," a finale-of-sorts because it was really just two really good episodes. I love the fact that, apart from that they all ended up eating Hank and Bobby's steaks, there really wasn't any big closing at all, just two naturally funny Bobby-centric episodes that showed why "King of the Hill" has always been funnier than anything else in Fox's Sunday night lineup - and a heck of a lot better than Mike Judge's latest movie, "Extract." R.I.P. Hill clan.

Next up was the season two finale of "True Blood," and man was that just a wildly entertaining mess. It hit me about five minutes into it that, even though what they had come up with all of Maryann's madness was just crazy enough to work, absolutely none of it came from Charlaine Harris' very popular Sookie Stackhouse novels (of which, since I'm nearing the end of book five, you can certainly count me as a fan.) And the ending (I'm just gonna have to assume that you've seen this by now if you want to)? If Sookie had somehow even agreed to marry Bill it would have just been way too much of a departure from the novels to even stomach, so I'm certainly glad that never happened (at least to his knowledge.)

But, amazingly, episode five of season three of "Mad Men" was still the best thing on TV last night, and by a pretty wide stretch. Poor Bertie giving birth while Don and his new prison guard buddy bonded over a bottle of booze? Priceless. And you can just tell that the schoolteacher is gonna be a femme fatale like Don just hasn't encountered yet. Of all his mistresses so far, Rosemarie DeWitt from season one would have to be my favorite, with Maggie Siff a close second, but you can just tell that the teacher will do more damage than the both of them combined, and I can't wait to see it unfold. And it really is amazing that season three so far is miles better than season two, which was just as much better than season one.

And I tell you all that to tell you this: In your mind, compare all that wild entertainment to what's going to be unleashed on NBC tonight and, for that matter, every weeknight at 10 p.m. or the foreseeable (or should it be "unforeseeable"?) future. Is there really anything worse you could imagine for primetime than FIVE HOURS A WEEK of Jay Leno kissing celebrities' asses? I can't come up with anything, and given the rather amazing amount of reality crap that pollutes most of the airwaves now, that's saying quite a bit.

Tonight will be a test of willpower for me, because I really like Jerry Seinfeld (Jay's first 10 p.m. guest), but I'm gonna stand strong and just say no. If I have any power at all (and, believe me, I'm well aware that I don't), please do me this tiny favor and never, ever tune in to this garbage. I have a feeling from everything I've read so far that, no matter how abysmal Jay's ratings might get, they're unlikely to pull him off the air any time soon because the show is just so cheap to produce, but we can still try, right?

OK, enough bile for a Monday morning. I'll leave you with something much more glorious: A making-of featurette for Wes Anderson's upcoming "Fantastic Mr. Fox." As you can see from this clip, Anderson clearly has the same respect for Roald Dahl and his work that Spike Jonze has for Maurice Sendak and his. Enjoy the clip, and have a perfectly passable Monday. Peace out.

Scab-free "Futurama" - plus two tantalizing trailers

Actually, there's at least a rumor out there today that's crazy enough I should really start out with it (and it's not the fact that Rob Marshall will be stepping in to direct "Pirates of the Caribbean 4," which I really couldn't care less about.)

It seems that, at least according to the Hollywood Reporter's Risky Biz blog, "500 Days of Summer" director Marc Webb may now be tapped to helm another big-screen take on "Jesus Christ Superstar." Take a second to digest that.

As for his first flick, which I saw a few weeks ago, I'd say like Summer herself I was in a state of "like" rather than "love" by the end. The two leads, Zooey Deschanel and Joseph Gordon Levitt, have charm to spare, as does most of the movie, but I couldn't help but feel an evolving sense of stasis since going in you knew at least sort of how it was going to end.

I will say two things in its favor: It's easily the best "romantic" movie I've seen so far this year, and as far as break-up movies go, it's just miles and miles and miles better than that turd of a flick "The Break-Up," starring Jennifer Aniston and Vince Vaughn. Man, did that stink. As for "500 Days of Summer," I'd say if it's playing anywhere near you, take a chance on it for a fun summer diversion.

And as for Universal's apparent plans to remake Tim Rice and Andrew Lloyd Webber's musical, which was already made into a wacky little flick by Norman Jewison, I'd say it could certainly work and will make a ton of money, and Webb can certainly do it. Myself I'd call marginally interested at best. I am, however, always interested in "She & Him" by Deschanel and M. Ward, which I'm listening to right now. Priceless.

Now to what for fans of good, smart, funny sci-fi can only be great news. I had a sneaking feeling that the news Twentieth Century Fox was recasting for the upcoming new episodes of "Futurama" on Comedy Central was just a negotiating ploy.

The main thing "Futurama" has going for it, beyond the fact that it's just thoroughly entertaining, is that it has a devoted fan base of folks like me. Going to the trouble of making new episodes after you've alienated everyone by firing the entire cast would really defeat the entire purpose of bringing it back.

Thankfully, it's not to be. It seems all the main cast members - Billy West, Katey Segal, John DiMaggio, Maurice LaMarche and Tress MacNeille - have all now signed for the new season of 26 episodes at a little less than they wanted but more than the studio was initially offering before breaking things off. So now I'm certainly in when this finally comes back in mid-2010 or so.

And in one other really good bit of TV news, it seems I will indeed be holding onto my HBO for a bit longer after this season of "True Blood," because the "Seinfeld" reunion of sorts on "Curb Your Enthusiasm" is turning into more than a minor affair.

I assumed they - Jerry Seinfeld, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Jason Alexander and Michael Richards - would only agree to it for one episode, but apparently I'm wrong (yes, I'm used to it by now.) When the show returns in September (I think), the "Seinfeld" angle will be a "major arc," with all the cast members appearing in at least five episodes, according to HBO. Rather than an actual "Seinfeld" reunion, Larry David says it will instead be more about why that would be such a bad idea in his mind and what everyone's been up to in the last 11 years (wow, really?) In the case of Richards, at least, that should be pretty fascinating.

OK, now on to the trailers. The first, which I think actually came out yesterday and was pointed out to me by Movie Mom Nell Minow, is the first trailer for Wes Anderson's "The Fantastic Mr. Fox," and I have to say it looks at least as good as I could have hoped. If you're gonna tell a classic children's tale, I'd much rather watch it in this appealing stop-motion style rather than with even-more-souped-up 3-D gadgetry. Enjoy, and stick around for one that gets me even more giddy.



Finally, as far as I know, this is the first trailer for Hayao Miyazaki's "Ponyo" that contains a lot of the Western voice-over, and though as usual the dubbing doesn't match up at all with the moving mouths, it still looks amazing. Seeing Ponyo turn from goldfish into little girl is just great, so here's hoping this really does open "NATIONWIDE" as Disney has promised on Aug. 14. And if you'll excuse me now, I'm off to see Judd Apatow's "Funny People" and hoping I'll like it a lot more than some of the critics have. Peace out.

Laika to live on and hopefully deliver lots more 3-D animated fun

Actually, before I get into any of that, it's that time of year, so there are a lot of TV "bubble" reports out there. The most surprising name I found on more than one of them was "Chuck," a show I just assumed was safe.

I just jumped on the "Chuck" bandwagon at the beginning of this second season, but now I'm thoroughly hooked. Sure, it gets a little old when every week Chuck "flashes" on a new Fulcrum agent he just happens to encounter, but the show is still easily the best mix of sly humor and action on TV right now.

According to the Hollywood Reporter, creator Josh Schwartz and company are now in the process of pitching a "game-changer" episode for this year's finale that will set up a third season (and hopefully more.) Stay tuned to this, fellow "Chuck" fans ...

And for those of you who still pay for HBO, there's much better news out there this morning for "Seinfeld" fans, of which you can certainly count me as one. The four principal stars - Jerry Seinfeld, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Jason Alexander and Michael Richards - will be featured in a multiple-episode story arc on HBO's "Curb Your Enthusiasm" this fall. That show, of course, was created by "Seinfeld" co-mastermind Larry David, who is starring in Woody Allen's upcoming summer flick, "Whatever Works."

In their honor, here's probably my favorite "Seinfeld" clip of all, featuring a deliriously funny cameo by Phillip Baker Hall as library inspector Bookman. Enjoy, and try not to laugh so loud you disturb your co-workers.



But here today it's all about the future of the animation house Laika, which before the success of "Coraline" was in fairly serious danger. Before seeing that Henry Selick flick, a thoroughly enchanting ode to the imagination, I had no idea that the studio was about to (or perhaps did) declare bankruptcy.

Now, however, with "Coraline" already having hauled in $62 million at the U.S. box office and still running fairly strong, the company has restructured its executives and is moving ahead with a very full slate of flicks. Travis Knight, son of Nike founder and Laika backer Phil Knight (yes, nepotism can be nice), will now take over as president and CEO of the animation house.

So, what does that mean for us viewers? Well, Laika is reportedly now moving ahead with an ambitious slate of no less than nine flicks, including these:

"Here Be Monsters": This appears to be a rather complicated but also hopefully delightfully twisted tale by Alan Snow about a young man who lives with his grandfather in the tunnels under the English city of Ratbridge until he's forced into action to save his fellow underlings from the Cheese Guild. Or, at least that's what I can gather from 30 seconds of Googling.

"The Wall and the Wing": Based on the bestseller by Laura Ruby and set in a future New York City, it's about a girl who can't fly in a world where most everyone else can. She can, however, turn herself invisible, and gets led into a life of crime and other chicanery. Or, once again, that's what I think it's about.

And finally, "Paranorman," based on an original idea by "Coraline" head of story Chris Butler. No matter what these actually turn out to be about, it's just nice to hear some good economic news for once, especially when it's hopefully combined with a nice slate of slightly off-kilter and visually engaging animation.

The "Watchmen" get seriously cheesy

From the exact opposite end of the animation scale qualitywise but still extremely funny comes this "Watchmen" spoof that surfaced today. I'm not sure who made it, but it jumps on the premise of what would happen if our heroes were to live on as a Saturday morning cartoon crew. It's all pretty priceless, but especially Rohrschach declaring "I'm nutty!" and pining for a kiss. Enjoy, and by all means go see "Watchmen" this weekend, which I'm going to do (in IMAX!) Saturday afternoon. Peace out.

To 3D or not to 3D?

For most of the world, the movie question for this weekend was probably about whether to watch the pretty teens of "High School Musical 3" or the bloodfest of "Saw V" (or perhaps in a truly twisted double feature, both), but for me it was whether or not to finally to take the plunge into 3D for a return to the great "Nightmare Before Christmas."

Since it was being applied to a movie I love, I decided to bite on Hollywood's latest gimmick. The movie itself has stood the test of time very well, with Danny Elfman's songs and Henry Selick's stop-motion animation as magical as ever (though not enough to make me forgive Mr. Elfman for those horrendous Oompa-Loompa songs he crafted for Tim Burton's simply awful "Willy Wonka" remake.) As for the technology, however, I think from now I'm gonna have to just say no.

Did it bring anything positive to the movie-viewing experience? My first impulse was to say no, but in fairness that magical moment when it starts to snow over Halloweentown was indeed fairly cool in 3D, with the snow flakes seeming to fall on top of you. That wasn't nearly enough, however, to make up for what it did to the rest of the movie.

The first problem is that those goofy glasses, which I was happy to find fit comfortably over my actual specs, managed to blur the often stark colors of Selick's dreamscape into a rather unpleasant gray. Not very cool at all.

Secondly, the 3D technology just seemed horribly out of place with the stop-motion style, which is beautiful in its sheer primitiveness. I tend to frown on most ultramodern animation anyway. As much as I loved Gil Kenan's "Monster House," the humans in that one just looked like space aliens (and in none of the best ways), and the effect was even worse with Jerry Seinfeld's "Bee Movie." Call me old-fashioned, but I know what I like.

The trailers offered a peak at what should be my next chance to choose between 3D and traditional animation, and ironically enough it was for another Henry Selick movie (huzzah!). Coming early next year will be "Coraline," directed by Mr. Selick in the stop-motion style from the novella by Neil Gaiman about a young girl who finds all kinds of surprises when she explores the apartment next door.

I kept the funky 3D glasses I paid $2 for, but assuming that "Coraline" will be released in both formats, I'll take the traditional style, as you can with the trailer below. Peace out.

"Bee Movie": Much abuzz about nothing

I apologize for that not-terribly-clever headline, but I offer it to kind of prove a point: It's about as funny as most of what you'll encounter in Jerry Seinfeld's "Bee Movie."

Which is a real shame, 'cause for the first fifteen minutes or so it's thoroughly charming and, more importantly, funny. Life in the hive, dominated by the leviathan Honex corporation (producing, of course, honey), makes for a rapid succession of very funny jokes about the life span of bees, working for your whole life, etc. With a lot more focus this could have been a kind of bee "Office Space," but alas it was not to be.

Because this flick thinks it has to be a lot more than that, our hero, Barry B. Benson (voiced with less than his usual smugness by Mr. Seinfeld) has to leave the hive, and that's where things fall apart. As my mind often does when movies start to lose its attention, I drifted to other movies I've had a beef with, in this case Tim Burton's thoroughly unnecessary "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory," but in reverse. What they both lacked after brilliant openings, as "Bee Movie" left the factory and Burton's "Charlie" went into it, was almost any sense of wonder at all.

Now, I understand that (with big help from Larry David and others) Mr. Seinfeld created a sitcom that was "about nothing," and managed to make a very funny one at that. To make an entertaining 90-minute animated movie about nothing, which he tried to do here, would be no mean feat, but despite being intermittently funny throughout it really doesn't even come close.

What's the big drama once our hero Barry leaves the hive? A lawsuit, and believe it or not, it's even less compelling on screen than you could possibly imagine it would be, despite the best efforts of John Goodman as the opposing attorney. Barry, of course, also meets and becomes smitten with a florist voiced by Renee Zellweger, who I'll return to later with, I'm warning you now, some venom.

First, a word about the overall look of "Bee Movie" which, again outside of the hive, is just depressingly generic. If you've seen Miyazaki's "Kiki's Delivery Service" (and if you haven't, why not), try not to think too much about young Kiki soaring over Miyazaki's majestic landscapes of Europe as you watch Barry and the "pollen jockeys" flying over the CGI, paint-by-numbers version of what is somehow supposed to be New York City in "Bee Movie."

What this newfangled animation does to scenery, however, is far less destructive than what it does to people, specifically poor Ms. Zellweger as the florist Vanessa. As animators try to make their human characters more real, it just gets more and more perverse, in this case turning Vanessa's face into what Ms. Zellweger's looks like each time directly after she's sucked off the pounds put on for a "Bridget Jones" movie. Not pretty. It doesn't help that Vanessa's voice and mannerisms just make you want to choke her and end it all.

So, as you can tell, I really didn't care too much at all for "Bee Movie," but before I go I'd like to offer a special note of encouragement to the very young lady who, as her mother informed us before the movie started, was enjoying (or not) her first moviegoing experience with this one. Take heart, young one, because there are much better flicks than "Bee Movie" out there for you to behold. For a start, have your mom rent "Ratatouille" next Tuesday to see what a wonder great animation can really be, though you might want to have her fast-forward through the rather scary opening sequence.

As for me, there's a hopefully much better movie in my immediate future, with a screening of Ridley Scott's "American Gangster" at noon. Peace out.

A great movie weekend in Macon

I realize that means it's at least as great a movie weekend everywhere else too, but a surprise, belated entry has me particularly psyched about the offerings in my little corner of the world.

So, in chronological order, here's what I'll be watching (except maybe the last one) and, if you check back throughout the weekend, I promise, reviewing here:

1. Bee Movie
This isn't the movie I most want to see this weekend, but due to the fact that it's playing on a gazillion screens it's the easiest one to catch before I have to go work today. I think I'd be more excited for this one if we hadn't been inundated with those "Dol-Bee" ads for what seems like three years now. After all, Jerry Seinfeld is a savagely funny guy, and it's much easier to get amped for animation when there's not a glut of it on the big screen, so here's hoping this sucks a lot less than I'm fearing.

2. American Gangster
Until I saw how few screens it's getting at my multiplex, due surely to it's length, among other factors, I was sure this would be the big winner at the box office this weekend. Denzel, Russell and gangsters ... what could be better? For my money, very little. I actually managed to do my senior thesis at Catholic University for a class in political film on something along the lines of "The Social Ramifications and Parallels of Early Gangster Films," which, even though I worked quite hard on it, always felt like a bit of a con. The reviews I've seen so far say this is a pretty by-the-numbers gangster flick, but I still suspect I'm gonna like it a lot.

3. Into the Wild
And here's the wild card late entry, and a flick that many readers of this site have been urging me to see for some time now. My father rather unintentionally spoiled the end of this one for me, which I would be more upset about if every review I've read since hadn't done the same thing. Jon Krakauer's "Under the Banner of Heaven" is one of the best books I've ever read, so I'm sure he delivered a rousing tale here about Christopher McCandless' trip down Thoreau's path, and by all accounts Sean Penn put a stirring visual cherry on top, so count me very psyched for this one too.

4. Across the Universe
I'll definitely need some persuading to drive a half hour to see this one in Centerville. I just love the Beatles far too much to see their songs sung by the likes of Eddie Izzard and, God forbid, Bono. If you've seen this one and there's something to recommend it that I'm just missing, please feel free to let me know.

And there you have it. A busy weekend for me at the movies. Here's hoping you have at least a fairly great one too.