Is it really that friggin hard for people to read?

Actually, the first thing on my mind this morning is that, against rather long odds (and even longer ones that it will last more than a few episodes), Joss Whedon's latest creation, "Dollhouse," is actually going to hit the airwaves on Fox this Friday at 9 (at the same time as the surely superior "Friday Night Lights.")

Speaking of "Friday Night Lights," I can't see any way the show can continue with a new crop of kids after this season, but if you watched last Friday's episode you know the show is certainly at least going to go out on top. Rarely does a character in an ensemble drama get the kind of sendoff that Brian "Smash" Williams (Gaius Charles) was given as he heads off for Texas A&M, and it was easily the finest hour of TV I've seen in the past year or so.

But back to Whedon's "Dollhouse." I was watching two entries in Fox's Sunday night lineup ("King of the Hill" and "American Dad") for the first time in a long while (I have decided to never again watch another new episode of "The Simpsons" because the show's creators have simply been repeating themselves for at least the past three years or so), and even fast-forwarding through the commercials it was impossible to miss the constant promos for "Dollhouse."

So, what is it again? Well, the show will star Eliza Dushku as an "active" or "doll" named Echo, one of a group of government operatives who have their minds wiped clean after they complete each mission. As you can see from the photo and promo clip I've attached at the end, this somehow also stars Ms. Cross (Olivia Williams) and Tahmoh Penikett of "Battlestar Galactica" fame, so if you like Whedon at all tune in for at least a few episodes of this latest entry into the Friday night graveyard (though "X-Files," of course, managed to thrive there for several years.)

And now, finally, the tidbit that sparked the admittedly surly headline for a Monday morning (especially one which I have off) was word that now not one but two of my five favorite flicks of 2008 are being remade for American audiences.

What in the world is going on here? I understand that it makes perfect sense to do an English-language remake of Guillaume Canet's "Tell No One," which it was just announced Luc Besson's EuropaCorp is about to take on, for several reasons. First, it made a fairly impressive $6 million at the U.S. box office, and second, it's just a first-rate thriller from an American source, the potboiler novel by Harlan Coben.

If you have the chance, though (and you will when it hits DVD on March 31), please see Canet's original long before this comes together. What you'll get is a sensational mind-bending thriller that fits solidly in the French tradition while adding a thoroughly modern touch, the best and most natural chase scenes I've seen in many years and just a great performance at its core from Francois Cluzet as the embattled doctor Alexandre Beck.

In an even worse idea, Matt Reeves, director of the surprisingly satisfying "Cloverfield," has signed on to write and direct a remake of the Swedish "romantic horror flick" "Let the Right One In," which I had the sublime pleasure of seeing at the 2008 Rehoboth Beach Independent Film Festival.

If you missed this one, which is somehow still playing once a night at Atlanta's Plaza Theater on Ponce de Leon Ave., certainly see it in its original form when it hits DVD on March 10. As much as an old-fashioned vampire flick, it's also a great coming-of-age story and just a moving tale about friendship - with your next door neighbor you think is a young girl but just happens to be a vampire. No description from me can describe just how good this one is, so I'll just let director Tomas Alfredson share what he thought when he got word of these dastardly remake plans:

"Remakes should be made of movies that aren't very good, that gives you the chance to fix whatever has gone wrong."

Amen, brother. And now, so I can go do my laundry in preparation for my three-day trek to Ohio to stand in the sleet and watch the American soccer team stomp some Mexicans in a World Cup qualifer, I'll leave you with that promised "Dollhouse" preview. Enjoy, and have a perfectly passable Monday. Peace out.

Enter the enchanting world of "Coraline"

Before seeing Henry Selick's rather amazing "Coraline," I was convinced that 3-D, be it in movies or television, was simply a gimmick to catch our extremely short attention spans for a few seconds. Now, however, at least when it comes to animation, you can count me as a true believer.

Actually, I was caught up in the magic of it even before the movie started, when for the first time I got to see the trailer for Pixar's next flick, "Up," for the first time in 3-D. It looks amazing, and I'm betting it will easily be one of this summer's best movies.

As for "Coraline" itself, this was only the second time I had bothered to don those goofy glasses (the first, oddly enough, being for another flick associated with Selick, the re-release of "The Nightmare Before Christmas"), and this was the first time that the 3-D effect felt perfectly organic to the story and only added to the world it was painstakingly used to create.

But as amazing as the stop motion animation/puppetry was, it all would have felt more than a little empty if it weren't for the strength of the story, adapted by Selick from the children's novella by Neil Gaiman with healthy doses of "Alice's Adventures In Wonderland," "The Wizard of Oz" and "Pan's Labyrinth" thrown in as inspiration.

Like Ophelia in Guillermo Del Toro's flick, our heroine Coraline constructs an elaborate fantasy world to escape the reality of her surroundings, here simply an old house in the middle of nowhere rather than the Spanish Civil War. In exploring her new abode, Coraline discovers a small door that's been painted over and, once opened, reveals in reality only another layer of bricks.

It's once she drifts off to sleep, however, that magical mice lead her through the door to an alternate universe in which she encounters an "other mother" and "other father" who, as opposed to her benign but somewhat neglectful real folks, offer her all the thrills that her own mind can conjure, plus some creepy creations that make this about as close as you can come to a horror movie for children (and not-yet-grown-up adults like me.)

I don't want to reveal any more than that about the story, but it's in this alternative universe that Selick's stable of animators/puppeteers get to really shine, most magically in Mr. Bobinsky's (voiced by Ian McShane) circus of bouncing mice (which you have to see to believe), but also in a pack of Scottie dogs who turn into bats at Coraline's command. Perhaps the most inane thing I've read in the past year was a debate at Aint It Cool News over whether these rather amazing mice were a feat of animation or simply CGI gimmickry; if you can't simply sit back and behold the visual feast that unfolds in front of you, I have to wonder why you go to the movies in the first place.

Selick/Gaiman's tale starts to unravel a bit as Coraline's dream world becomes more of a nightmare, but even here it's kept afloat as the vision of our young heroine, voiced with surprising spirit by Dakota Fanning (who, frankly, until she becomes a young adult instead of a kid trying desperately to be one, is better heard but not seen in my book, hence I won't be going to see her play an alcoholic in "Push" this weekend.) I loved watching her use the everyday objects around her to construct her elaborate fantasy world and the fact that as impudent as young Coraline can often be, the single thing that appears to irk her the most is that people in the real world too often address her as "Caroline."

In case you can't tell by now, I rather unconditionally loved this flick, and it was only after taking off those goofy glasses and returning to my own reality that I began to wonder just who this movie was intended for. Enchanting enough for kids but perhaps a tad too scary, it's probably aimed mostly at grown-up geeks like me, and I'm not sure that's enough of an audience to make this anything approaching a box-office winner.

In fact, a quick visit to Box Office Mojo revealed that on Friday it took in a respectable-but-not-great haul of about $4.5 million, far behind the $10.5 million or so of "He's Just Not That Into You" but thankfully a full million ahead of Steve Martin's latest attempt to crap all over the career of Peter Sellers.

My advice is simply that if you like going to the movies to escape for a little while and be thoroughly enchanted by a movie that's as visually stunning as it is simply entertaining, go see "Coraline," and if you can, certainly see it in 3-D. Peace out.

The funniest three minutes you'll see all weekend

I'm not sure if this is hitting theaters this weekend, but if not you can at least enjoy it here.

Writer/director Jody Hill, who created last year's very funny "Foot Fist Way" for Danny McBride to star in (rent it already!), is now back with something called "Observe and Report."

Though I didn't bother to see "Paul Blart: Mall Cop," I can only assume it was a different kind of thing than what Seth Rogen and Mr. Hill have cooked up here for a second flick on the subject (and, just so you can't say I didn't warn you, there is indeed a mall security TV show coming this fall ... who knew it was so fascinating?)

Just one word of warning: This is a red-band trailer, full of f-bombs and other suitably R-rated material. It's also, however, very funny, so enjoy. Now I'm off to see "Coraline" and can't friggin' wait!

What would David Fincher have done with "Spider-Man"?

Actually, I don't wonder too much about that, since Sam Raimi did a damn fine job with the first two "Spider-Man" flicks (and with "Spider-Man 2" made what remains my favorite superhero movie of all time.) If the question were simply "What would David Fincher have done with "Spider-Man 3"?, then I would have been on board, because that flick was simply a big flaming turd.

I'm trying desperately to have a bit of fun with this today, but coming the day after what's left of the "newspaper" I work for laid off 58 people - with more to come in the next two weeks - it just isn't too easy, so bear with me.

OK, enough about that bitterness. The Fincher goofiness comes courtesy of the UK's Guardian, which transcribed the director's fairly surly responses to questions from the audience after a screening of "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button" (those audience members, at least, who were still awake after watching that snoozer.)

“I was asked if I might be interested in the first ‘Spider-Man,’ and I went in and told them what I might be interested in doing, and they hated it,” he said. “The thing I liked about Spider-Man was I liked the idea of a teenager,” continued Fincher, “the notion of this moment in time when you’re so vulnerable yet completely invulnerable.”

OK, I'm down with that, and given Fincher's work (before "Benjamin Button," at least), it certainly would have been a darker affair. I would have to assume he blew the job interview, if he hadn't already, if he then told the movie suits this:

“I wasn’t interested in the genesis, I just couldn’t shoot somebody being bitten by a radioactive spider – just couldn’t sleep knowing I’d done that,” stated the director.

Oh really? You wouldn't have been able to sleep after making a movie that's beloved by millions of people. Get over yourself, sir, and please get back to making movies much better than "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button." (Which, if it ever gets off the ground, would be Mr. Fincher's take on "Heavy Metal" with "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles" creator Kevin Eastman. Nothing but cool there.)

What's next for Terry Gilliam?

Actually, I'm more curious about when we all might be able to see "The Imaginarium of Dr. Parnassus," which has rather miraculously made it to "post-production." At the IMDB it has a June release date for the UK, but not yet any for the U.S.A. I can only hope that Johnny Depp, Jude Law and Colin Ferrell stepping into the finish the work of the late Heath Ledger will be enough to get this crazy tale also starring Tom Waits and Christopher Plummer playing everywhere (even near me!) fairly soon.

As for what Mr. Gilliam's doing next, you have to be able to read French to figure out anything about that, something that I don't do all that well anymore, but here goes.

According to two great French sites, Cinempire.com and Toutlecine.com, Gilliam's next project, set to begin filming in May, will be something called "Zero Theorem" starring Billy Bob Thornton.

After that is where it gets more than a bit murky. The not-terribly-revealing French summary reads like this: un génie de l’informatique reclus et tourmenté qui, en travaillant sur un mystérieux projet, tente de répondre une fois pour toutes aux questions relatives à l’absurdité et au sens de la vie.

OK, here goes: The best I can make from that is it will be about a "reclusive and tormented" guy (Karl Childers, we can only assume) who works on a mysterious project to answer for once all the questions about the "absurdity of life." Not that that helps much, but it certainly sounds absurd enough for Mr. Gilliam.

Actually, the best thing in the Toutlecine report, and the reason I still love Terry Gilliam, is that he's actually still trying to make "The Man Who Killed Don Quixote" - and still trying to chase down Johnny Depp to do it. If he actually pulls this off - even after having his initial failure captured in the entertaining documentary "Lost in La Mancha" - it will have to be just the portrait or persistence (or, I suppose, obstinacy - it's all in how you look at it.)

Soderbergh to play "Moneyball"

Even though I found Steven Soderbergh's "Che" one of the most painful exercises in cinematic hubris I've ever sat through (and I did make it through all nearly five hours, with an intermission), I can still manage to get excited that he's now setting his sights on a baseball flick.

With Brad Pitt in tow to play Oakland A's general manager Billy Beane, Soderbergh is about to sign on to direct "Moneyball," based on the book "Moneyball: The Art of Winning an Unfair game" by Michael Lewis. Steven Zaillain is attached to write the script.

For anyone who may not know, Beane became famous for developing a program of computer analysis that allowed the A's to compete with the big bad Yankees and Red Sox without having their big bad payrolls. Even if this turns out to be a big baseball geek fest, that would be just fine with me.

As for Soderbergh, he'll be up next with "The Informant," described as a black comedy starring Matt Damon as Mark Whitacre, a government whistle-blower who tried to take down Archer Midlands for price fixing.

And on that note, I have to get ready to go to my job while I still have one. Peace out.

Looking for the next "Arrested Development"?

"Nothing for 40 years in the business, then my son graduates from college, goes to work for Price Waterhouse and boom!"
- The ever-humble Richard Jenkins on his much-deserved Oscar nomination for "The Visitor"

As for the headline of this post, it comes from the lead of a Variety story on Imagine and its move back into TV comedy. As anyone who's seen "Arrested Development" knows, however, there could only ever be one show quite that madly entertaining.

That said, any effort to bring actually funny comedies to Fall TV is welcome in this little corner of the world, especially since I just assumed it would pretty much be a victim of the recent writers' strike.

What "Arrested Development" producer Brian Grazer was actually talking about that led to Variety's little bit of hyperbole does indeed sound like it could fit that bill, especially since it comes one half of the creative team behind "Gilmore Girls" (and not the half that created the unqualified disaster "The Return of Jezebel James.")

Daniel Palladino will be the main writer for a sitcom loosely based on Grazer's father, who Grazer said was "a lawyer with a slightly questionable moral compass." The show will be called "The Chairman of Chatsworth," so keep your eyes out for it.

Michael Gambon peruses "The Book of Eli"

I think the reason I just can't get too much into apocalyptic movies is that, once they're over, the world never really does end (not that I'm looking forward to that or anything), but I'm gonna give the genre at least one more chance for "The Book of Eli," for several reasons.

First and foremost, it's the very welcome return to feature film directing for the Hughes Brothers, Allen and Albert, who have been out of the movie game for far too long.

Secondly, with the new addition of Michael Gambon (a k a Albus Dumbledore the second), it's acquiring a first-rate cast. Denzel Washington plays the titular Eli in what the IMDB describes as a "post-apocalyptic Western, in which a lone man fights his way across America in order to protect a sacred book that holds the secrets to saving humankind." Gambon will play one half of a "strange couple that holds onto old traditions," and Gary Oldman's in on this somehow too.

But most of all I'm just happy to see the Hughes working on a big-time film again (with this one tentatively set for release next January), because they showed so much promise before pretty much disappearing after 2001's "From Hell."

Will Johnny Depp really write "The Rum Diary"?

Speaking of a director who is soon (hopefully) to make a welcome return after an even longer absence, the adaptation of Hunter S. Thompson's "The Rum Diary" to star Johnny Depp and be directed by Bruce Robinson indeed appears to be back on again.

Robinson, as you may or may not remember, made the simply brilliant "Withnail and I" in 1987 and only two films since (neither of which I have seen.) I just assumed that "The Rum Diary" project, based on Thompson's semi-autobiographical novel about a young journalist working in Puerto Rico in the 1950s, was buried somewhere in deep development, but it hit the wire again this morning.

The latest bit of news is that Amber Heard (Dale Denton's just-about-jailbait girlfriend in "Pineapple Express") is about to sign on to play the female lead, which will put her in the middle of a love triangle between Depp's Paul Kemp and a fellow journalist.

That all sounds good to me, but it will sound so much better if this ever comes close to becoming an actual movie, and I'll certainly tell you if it does.

Who watches the Watchmen?

I've recently started re-reading Alan Moore and Robert Gibson's "Watchmen" graphic novel again to get psyched up for the movie, and I can report that it more than stands the test of time. As I've lugged it around town to read over lunch, no less than three strangers (all dudes, of course) have come up to me to tell me how much they love the book, and I have to say I share that devotion.

And I'm reasonably confident that Zack Snyder's feature film, when it comes out March 6, will be a real winner. All I know for sure so far is that the viral marketing machine has certainly been efficient, with the video below about the Keene Act to suppress masked vigilante justice being the most recent bit of promotion. Enjoy it, and have a perfectly pleasant Thursday. Peace out.

A behind-the-scenes look at AMC's take on "The Prisoner"

It would be good enough that AMC is simply ponying up for a third (and presumably fourth and fifth) season of "Mad Men" for this summer, but I'm also becoming more and more confident that what's coming with it - a six-episode remake of "The Prisoner" - will also far from completely suck.

On its surface, the idea hardly seems like a good one. The original series, starring and co-created by the recently late Patrick McGoohan as Number Six, was, well, extremely British (so is "Absolutely Fabulous" in a more than slightly different way, but that one's coming to U.S. TV next fall too, unfortunately.)

For anyone who's never seen it, McGoohan played a former secret agent working for the British during the Cold War who resigns on the first episode and is then kidnapped and held hostage in an isolated spot known only as the Village. In the original series, he's grilled by a series of interrogators known collectively as Number Two, even though they were played by a different person for each episode.

And therein comes the first big change for AMC's model: Number Two will be played for all six episodes by Sir Ian McKellen (coincidentally enough, I was just watching Sir Ian's explanation of his acting technique last night on "Extras": "How did I know where to stand? They told me." Exceptionally funny.) Number Six will be played by none other than Jesus himself, a k a Jim Caveizel.

Despite these modifications, I'm still fairly confident this will be good after watching this video from AMC, which shows that Namibia serves as the setting for The Village and then the crew moved onto Cape Town (rough life!) for the rest of the shoot. As long as this doesn't turn into an exercise in torture (why is seeing someone getting tortured considered entertaining? I'll never understand it, but I digress ...), this should make for a fantastic summertime diversion. Enjoy the video, and to watch all 17 episodes of the original series, courtesy of AMC, click here (though every time I have tried so far it has crashed my Firefox.)



David Simon's "Treme" rapidly taking shape

I probably should have led with this news about "Treme," the new HBO pilot from "The Wire" creator David Simon, especially since it is now set to star one of my favorite actors.

The series about musicians in New Orleans had already attracted two members of "The Law" from "The Wire" (more on that in a second), and now Steve Zahn and Kim Dickens have also signed on. Zahn (who will always be known to me as Glenn Michaels) will play Davis Rogan, a street dancer, local radio DJ, band member and New Orleans native with "anger issues" ( I can see that in my mind already). Dickens (Matt Saracen's mom on the current [and still sensational] season of "Friday Night Lights" but also Jeanie Stubbs on "Deadwood") will play a chef who has opened her own restaurant.

Joining this duo will be easily two of my favorite "Wire" vets, "Bunk" Moreland and Lester Freamon. Wendell Pierce, a New Orleans native, will play a jazz musician who's fallen on hard times after Katrina and who still has a soft spot for his ex-wife, played by "CSI Miami" star Khandi Alexander. Even better, Clarke Peters will be playing a Mardi Gras Indian chief who's trying to bring the members of his tribe back to the city.

So far this is only being put together as a pilot, but I can't imagine HBO wouldn't take anything short of at least a full season from Simon, especially with this cast behind it. I cancelled my HBO after the end of the first season of "True Blood," but I'll definitely re-up if and when this ever really comes together. Peace out.

A busy day of news (and a beef about 3D)

"It's so similar to the toilet scene in 'Trainspotting.' "
- Danny Boyle, with feces on his mind in Variety

There's quite a bit of news out there today, but since I like to stand in the way of speeding trains and enjoy my favorite TV shows without getting a headache, can I please first make a plea for an end to 3D gimmicks on TV?

Last night's episode of "Chuck" would have been perfectly enjoyable in the 2D format, but since I was watching it with just my old-fashioned specs on, it did indeed get more than a little on my nerves by the finish. Did anyone actually watch this with the 3D glasses on, and, if so, was there really any reason for this beyond NBC clearly being in constant need of attention?

OK, enough of that. The best thing I could find out there this morning is that Martin Scorsese is finally getting back to making another religious movie, and bringing some big names along to do it. "Kundun" has lasted as my second favorite Scorsese movie (after only the sublimely silly "After Hours"), so this is certainly good news.

"Silence," which will be his next feature film, takes place in 17th century Japan and follows the tale of two Jesuit priests who travel there and face violence and persecution on their mission. Even better, as best as I can tell, Daniel Day-Lewis and Benicio Del Toro will play the two priests, and Gael Garcia Bernal will also be along for the ride.

That all sounds well and good, but Mr. Scorsese will of course have another movie coming out well before this, the recently wrapped "Shutter Island," which should just be a heck of a lot of fun next October. In that one, based on the novel by Dennis Lehane, Leo DiCaprio plays a U.S. Marshal who is investigating the disappearance of a murderess who escaped from a hospital for the criminally insane and is presumed to be hiding on the remote isle. Very cool.

Finally, a movie about the war on terror I might actually enjoy?

Actually, Kimberly Pierce's "Stop-Loss" was pretty good, but since that was about the Iraq war I guess it's at least a slightly different subject.

Now, however, no less than Aaron Sorkin is returning to the military courtroom to pen "The Challenge," which takes on the topic of the prison at Gitmo (and, if Barack Obama actually gets his way, this might oddly enough come out right about the time the Guantanamo Bay prison closes.)

George Clooney is producing, may direct and wants to star in the flick as Navy lawyer Charles Swift, who led the drive to ensure a fair trial for Osama Bin Laden's driver, Salim Hamdan, who had been held at Gitmo for five years.

Captured in 2001 in Afghanistan while transporting two missiles in a car, Hamdan was ultimately convicted and sentenced to 5 1/2 years by a military commission for providing material support to Al-Qaeda. He was cleared of the terrorism conspiracy charges that would have drawn a much longer sentence.

Any news about Aaron Sorkin writing (and not for television!) is good news in this corner. If you haven't seen "Charlie Wilson's War," you're missing out on a sharp satire, so rent it already. And Sorkin is thankfully keeping very busy nowadays, having already penned "The Trial of the Chicago 7," which Ben Stiller (!?!?) is directing for Dreamworks, and is now also working on a flick about the formation of Facebook, which I am somehow on even though I don't yet even have a cell phone.

Woody's returning to New York, and I might even get to see it

Purely by coincidence, I was watching that great "Seinfeld" episode recently in which Kramer manages to get a line ("these pretzels are making me thirsty!") in a Woody Allen flick before getting fired from the set.

In a case of art imitating reality and coming back around to art, "Seinfeld" co-creator Larry David is starring in Woody Allen's next flick, "Whatever Works," which Sony Pictures Classics has now picked up and will hopefully distribute wide enough to reach my little corner of the world when this comes out later this year.

In Woody's return to Manhattan (finally!), here (according to Wikipedia, at least) is what the flick starring Mr. David, Evan Rachel Wood, Ed Begley Jr., Patricia Clarkson, Kristen Johnston and Michael McKean is about: "The film is a dark comedy starring Larry David as an eccentric man from Greenwich Village who gets caught up in a series of love stories which get him tangled up with a young girl from the South (Evan Rachel Wood) and her parents."

Well, I guess Woody casting someone else as the dirty old man rather than himself is some kind of progress, and Larry David is just an extremely funny guy, so I can only say bring it on.

Tidbits

OK, I have to get ready for work soon, so two quick hits and then I'll go. Did you know that Spike Lee unveiled a documentary this year at Sundance? I didn't, until this morning. Called "Pushing Strange," it focused Lee's camera on the final three performances of the Broadway musical of the same name. The show is about a young black musician growing up in Los Angeles in the 1970s and his quest to find "the real." As cheesy as that might sound, I'm betting this will be nothing but cool if I ever get to see it. Besides, with "When the Levees Broke," "The Original Kings of Comedy" and my favorite, "Four Little Girls," on his resume, I'd say Mr. Lee knows a thing or two about making compelling documentaries.

And, finally, Julian Schnabel has tapped Hiam Abbas to star in "Miral," a movie he's making about the Palestinian-Israeli conflict. Schnabel will write and direct the adaptation of Italo-Palestinian Rula Jebreal's book about the real-life Palestinian woman Hind Husseini, who started the Dar Al-Tifl orphanage in Jerusalem in the wake of the 1948 partition of Palestine and the creation of the state of Israel. And, best of all, Abbas, who starred in one of my favorite flicks of 2008 in "The Visitor," will presumable play the lead role, so definitely keep your eyes on this one. Peace, appropriately enough, out.

Actually, to make hopefully any Tuesday a little better, here's that "These pretzels are making me thirsty" clip, still one of my favorite "Seinfeld" bits. Enjoy!

One thing you definitely will see during tonight's Super Bowl

First off, ahearty huzzah to Danny Boyle, who was the big winner at last night's Directors Guild of America awards for "Slumdog Millionaire." Unless "Milk" somehow pulls an upset, this sets up a big Oscar night coming for Boyle and friends, and that would certainly be fine with me.

And today I'm off to see "Taken" before going to watch the Super Bowl with some good friends of mine (and I made one of my very favorite dishes, Holly Clegg's crispy Southwestern lasagna.)

Along with the football, of course, the ads get almost as much attention, and this year there will be a lot of spots for movies. A lot of them ("Land of the Lost"!?!?) I couldn't care less about, but one, Harold Ramis' "The Year One," is definitely worth staying in your seat for.

With Ramis writing and directing his first flick since "Analyze That" (OK, not the best of movies), this is certainly a reason for comedy fans to celebrate. Jack Black, Michael Cera, Paul Rudd and David Cross all make an appearance in the clip below, and many other funny people will be on board for the tale of two hunters (Black and Cera) roaming the earth in biblical times. Black has promised something in the style of "Monty Python's Life of Brian," and while I'm sure it can't meet that high standard, I'm still betting this is going to be very funny.

Enjoy the Super Bowl spot and the big game itself. Monday morning I have friggin' jury duty for the first time in my life, so if anyone has any legal strategies to get out of it, please let me know!

When's the last time you saw a great baseball movie?

Well, I actually saw "For Love of the Game" just the other day on DVD, and as sappy it is that one still just gets me every time, but I'm talking about a new-to-theaters, bona fide baseball movie.

I couldn't remember one for several years now, but "Half Nelson" creators Ryan Fleck and Anna Boden have one (very long) in the works that sounds just about perfect.

First premiering at the 2008 Sundance Film Festival, their flick "Sugar" follows the fictional saga of Miguel "Sugar" Santos, a Dominican pitcher who comes up through a baseball academy in San Pedro de Macoris and gets a shot to test his talents in America. Though there have been occasional movies about minor league baseball ("Bull Durham" the most famous, of course), this is the first one I can think of that addresses the Dominican pipeline.

This is apparently going to finally get some kind of American release in April, but I'll probably have to catch it on DVD. Enjoy the trailer.



When it comes to sports movies, the only ones I like more than baseball flicks are ones about soccer. Heck, I even like the corny "Goal" series, which so far has followed Mexican immigrant Santiago Munez to Newcastle United and then to Real Madrid and - in the chapter I haven't seen yet - eventually to the 2006 World Cup.

There are much better soccer movies than those, of course, and the one I found a trailer for at the froggy film site Cinempire.com looks like a real winner.

Starring Michael Sheen (and therefore by law, apparently, written by Peter Morgan, from a novel I now have to read by David Peace), "The Damned United" tells the story of very successful English football manager Brian Clough at his most unsuccessful point. Hired to coach Leeds United in 1974, Clough only managed to last 44 days, in which he managed to win only one out of six games and alienate just about everyone associated with the club.

This one is listed as coming out in March in the UK, and hopefully it will sometime after that play wide enough to even reach my little corner of the world. Anyways, here's the very enjoyable trailer. Have a great rest of the weekend.

What - if anything - to watch this weekend?

Actually, the best thing I could find out there this morning is that Lauren Graham is returning to primetime TV in something that's at least called a "comedy," part of ABC's big buy back into the sitcom game.

Graham, a k a Lorelai Gilmore the elder, will play a female talk show host who urges her viewers to just "Let It Go," but finds she can't follow her own advice after being dumped by her boyfriend. Sounds like a big ball of meh, but I was a big enough "Gilmore Girls" fan that I'll give it at least few episodes next fall.

But here today it's all about the movie weekend, which doesn't look great, but for a January weekend in Hollywood's silly season it certainly could be a lot worse. Is there really anything new out there worth watching this weekend (at least in wide-release world, which my little corner of the world is part of)? Here, in order of how much I want to see them, is the breakdown, and if you've seen any of these and want to offer a word of warning, please feel free to do so.

1. "Taken"
I saw Pierre Morel's "District B13" a few months ago on DVD, and it was pretty sensational. Morel's futuristic vision of Paris was a trip, and stuntman-turned-actor Cyril Raffaeli had the chops to keep up with the simply frenetic action. It shows the full potential of the new French action wave, but I can't shake the feeling that "Taken" will be - at best - a pale knockoff.

For one thing, rather than looking forward, Morel's new flick actually came out a year ago in France and - according to The New Yorker, at least - employs tired torture sequences that we've seen far too many times before. Even so, I'm willing to give it a chance because Liam Neeson (as a retired CIA agent, of course) is just cool and it will hopefully be a fun ride, not just yet another movie about all the evil things that happen when Americans venture overseas (I haven't been to Paris in years, but I'm fairly certain it really isn't all that dangerous a place.) Here's the trailer.



2. "The Uninvited"
I'm fairly certain I haven't seen any horror movies that are remakes of Asian flicks since "The Ring," but with Elizabeth Banks and David Strathairn somehow in this one I just might give it a chance. I actually have seen Kim Jee-woon's original South Korean flick, "A Tale of Two Sisters," and that one is as simply bizarre as it is creepy.

I can't imagine this version helmed by first-time feature directors and brothers Thomas and Charles Guard will be anywhere near as good, but I think I just might find out as a pre-Super Bowl matinee. Enjoy the trailer.



3. "New in Town"
Just when I think my rather extreme dislike of Renee Zellweger is unfair, she once again turns up in something like this, which just looks like the most familiar, fish-out-of-water tripe. And frankly, I've been to Minnesota several times now, and while I will concede some of those folks do talk kinda funny, so do a lot of the people down here in my adopted home of Macon, GA. Is that really enough to make the basis of a feature film? Apparently so, but not enough to make me watch it. Here's the trailer.



So there you have it. I could also, I suppose, get caught up on the prestige pics by seeing either "Revolutionary Road" or "The Reader," but after sitting through (and almost completely enjoying) Jonathan Demme's thoroughly dysfunctional "Rachel Getting Married," I think I'm just in the mood for some entertainment for the masses. Have a perfectly pleasant weekend, and as I said, if you've seen any of these and want to share your opinion, please don't hesitate to do so.

One thing you most likely won't be seeing at this year's Super Bowl

Actually, before I get into any madness involving PETA, there's word this morning that Joe Carnahan, who has tried and failed to win the financing for several other movies since "Smokin' Aces," is now attached to direct a big-screen version of "The A Team."

Though I get proven wrong almost daily, so am well used to it by now, I really can't see this being anything but a mess, but I really liked Carnahan's "Narc" quite a bit, so I guess it's at least good to see the man working. Last I heard he was encircling a movie of James Ellroy's "White Jazz" or the Pablo Escobar biopic "Killing Pablo," either of which would most likely be better than seeing the further adventures of Hannibal and B.A. next summer (though, of course, I did just adore them as a kid.)

As for "Smokin' Aces," except for the very funny stuff with Taraji P. Henson and Alicia Keys, I thought that one was just a bloated disaster.

Here today, however, because I don't have time for much before heading out, it's all about PETA and the Super Bowl ad that NBC says is simply too racy for the big game. I may not agree with their goal, since I eat chicken at least once a day and have never felt too guilty about it, but I do like watching what PETA does as a constant provocateur.

And, I guess this ad featuring lingerie models and vegetables (remember, if you're watching this at work, I did warn you) does indeed provoke something. It's just about exactly what you would be expecting, but if you aren't offended by a list of female body parts, please read on after the jump for NBC's very funny second-by-second breakdown of just what they object to.



:12- :13- licking pumpkin

:13- :14- touching her breast with her hand while eating broccoli

:19- pumpkin from behind between legs

:21- rubbing pelvic region with pumpkin

:22- screwing herself with broccoli (fuzzy)

:23- asparagus on her lap appearing as if it is ready to be inserted into vagina

:26- licking eggplant

:26- rubbing asparagus on breast

Well, there's not really I can add to the words "rubbing asparagus on breast," so I'll simply say have a perfect passable Wednesday. Peace out.

Three - or four - of the weirdest things you'll hear today, I guarantee

Well, actually, the first isn't terribly weird, but it certainly is (with some reservations, of course) good to hear that the first big-screen installment of Tintin, to be called "Tintin: Secret of the Unicorn," is moving forward with huge names attached.

Paramount Pictures and Sony on Monday announced the start of principal production on the 3D motion capture animation film. Even better is that Billy Elliott himself, Jamie Bell, will be Tintin, and he'll be chased down by Daniel Craig as the evil Red Rackham.

For anyone unfamiliar with Tintin, he was the main character - a reporter, huzzah! - in Hergé's series of 24 comics. I have a couple of them on my shelf, and they're my favorite way to see if I can still navigate my way through anything in French.

Some other details from Monday's release (new and old) included that Steven Spielberg is directing the first installment in this planned trilogy, with Peter Jackson set for the second and a director-yet-to-be-named for the third. The movie, rather remarkably, is being written by veryfunnyman Edgar Wright, "Doctor Who" scribe Steven Moffatt and some dude named Joe Cornish.

And if Edgar Wright's on board, that means Nick Frost and Simon Pegg are too, to play the bumbling detectives Thompson and Thomson. They'll be joined by Andy Serkis, Toby Jones, Mackenzie Crook and Gad Elmaleh.

But enough about a movie that's not set to come out until 2011. As promised, here are the three weirdest things I encountered this morning, two of which fall squarely in the category of "a man's gotta eat," and the third of which just makes me ill.

First up, and I missed this because I didn't bother to tune in to any but the last 10 minutes of the Screen Actors Guild Awards show, much less anything from the red carpet.

Somewhere in that three hours or so, Golden Globe winner Mickey Rourke (who lost out that night to Sean Penn, which is how the Oscars will probably break down too) revealed that he has agreed to follow up "The Wrestler" by actually becoming one at Wrestlemania 25, in a showdown with former WWE champion Chris Jehricho.

While I've never been to a live Wrestlemania event, at some point in the '80s I did score what is still my favorite baby-sitting gig, getting a free ticket to watch one year's extravaganza on closed-circuit TV as long as I agreed to take my two young neighbors with me. I have no idea what the card was, but I do know Hulk Hogan was there, and that I had a blast.

But could it possibly be a wise move for Mr. Rourke to jump into the squared circle? Well, I can't see him getting any serious movie work out of the deal, but I can't imagine he much cares either. I'd have to assume he's 1)having a lot of fun and 2) getting paid more than I make in an entire year, so why not?

Next up, and as an avowed enemy of any reality TV, I must say much sadder news, the great Mike White will be appearing on the next installment of "The Amazing Race."

Remember Mike White? Before deciding to run around the world for our "entertainment," he was (and surely still is) a very funny writer and director, responsible for penning "School of Rock" and "Nacho Libre" (which, yes, I do like quite a bit) and directing "Year of the Dog." He's also written a screenplay, "Them," about the fact that giant ants are somehow our real rulers, that will hopefully someday be directed by the aforementioned Edgar Wright.

Well before that, of course, he wrote three episodes of the simply perfect "Freaks and Geeks" and even appeared on one episode as Kim Kelly's water-headed brother, Chip. I had been hoping he would return to TV again after his short-lived Fox sitcom "Cracking Up," but I certainly wasn't expecting it to be like this.

For CBS' reality show, he'll be racing with his pop, Mel White, described as a writer, filmmaker, professor, pastor and gay-rights activist.

The Whites will be seen racing against a deaf guy and his mom, a pair of dwarf sibling stuntmen, a pair of sibling Harvard Law grads, a pair of hot redheads, a pair of blonde flight attendants and a pair of twentysomethings from The Bronx.

Oh well. I guess it could be worse. Here's hoping this is just a fun diversion with dad rather than any kind of permanent career move into TV's alternate reality.

And finally, saving the worst for last - and, really, I can't believe I'm typing this - Hilary Duff is set to play Bonnie Parker in a new take on "Bonnie and Clyde."

Just stop for a second and try to take that in, and then I'll continue ...

OK, here goes ... writer/director Tonya S. Holly says she was inspired to create this sure-to-be abomination - which she says is a "new adaptation," of course, rather than a "remake" of the 1967 film, which finds a home on the list of my top 10 films whenever I bother to compile them - after she found newspaper clippings about the gangster duo in an abandoned house on her family's property.

The big question is, however, how do you get from there to casting Hilary Duff in the role made famous by Faye Dunaway (and some joker I've never heard of named Kevin Zegers as Clyde Barrow)? I used to have a co-worker, Dan Maley, who said he was OK with his kids being infatuated with Ms. Duff since she didn't swear, take her clothes off or do anything else terribly harmful to younguns. But does that mean she can act? (For full disclosure, I've seen her in exactly one thing, a single episode of "Joan of Arcadia," so I guess I really can't be the judge of that.)

I do know that if Bonnie Parker heard this, she'd shoot young Ms. Duff right in the face, but since I'm slightly less prone to extreme violence, I guess I'll just have to sigh and start getting ready for work. Peace out.

Become an uninvited guest with "Rachel Getting Married"

Before I launch into this review, did anyone else find it more than a little odd that noted thespian Katie Holmes was chosen to give out the best actor in a motion picture award at last night's Screen Actor's Guild Awards? Just a random thought ...

I have to say Jonathan Demme's "Rachel Getting Married" might just be the most unpleasant movie that I thoroughly enjoyed. And I can tell you, if you think you've seen every possible kind of movie wedding, think again.

What Demme has accomplished here, with a big assist from screen writer Jenny Lumet (daughter of Sidney), is something as overall as creepy as any horror movie, but instead of the usual gore the horrors here are all emotional and all too real. You never get the sense that you're really supposed to be there, and watching these extremely personal events unfold at a natural pace as an uninvited guest is a singular movie-viewing experience.

But I guess a word or two about the plot is in order, since the fairly straightforward title only gets things started. As the titular Rachel (RoseMarie DeWitt, a k a Don Draper's hippie mistress Midge on the first season of "Mad Men") is indeed getting married, her sister Kim (Anne Hathaway, as you probably know) is returning from nine months of drug rehab to steal some of the spotlight.

The movie is at its best when the two of them come together, and each sister would be a fairly trite cliche (the family success and the black sheep) if the parts weren't so well written and performed. Hathaway's rehearsal dinner toast, after begging her way at the last minute into the role of maid of honor, has gotten the most attention, and it is indeed a simmering pot of desperate neediness. But the reason it works so well is that it comes at the end of a series of wedding tributes full of the usual love and awkward moments, making it all the more jarring when Hathaway's Kim turns the spotlight on herself instead of the happy couple.

Hathaway is indeed exceptional here, but it's when we find out that there's a real tragedy buried among her many secrets and lies (which you won't hear about from me) that the actors around her get to excel. Bill Irwin as the father of the bride is hard to watch as he struggles to keep his face in a perma-grin as the big weekend starts to unravel. DeWitt's Rachel lets her resentment at this last-minute wedding intrusion simmer until it boils over, and at that point every word becomes a sharp dagger. One scene that perfectly captures the mix of bonhomie and real pain comes when Irwin and Rachel's husband-to-be Sidney (Tunde Adebimpe, who just happens to be black, a fact that creates refreshingly little to no drama) try to turn the tedious task of loading the dishwasher into a competitive sport to ease the tension.

I don't want to reveal too much more, but there is indeed eventually a wedding, and the joy it brings is just as real as the trauma, and a desperately needed respite. My only real beef with Demme's film is that he felt the need to lard up the reception a bit with more than a few of his music industry friends, but even here it was really nice to see Sister Carol East of "Something Wild" fame again.

In the end, if you can handle a brutal emotional battlefield, I can highly and almost unconditionally recommend "Rachel Getting Married." In closing, here's a flashback that just made me smile, Sister Carol performing "Wild Thing" for the closing credits of "Something Wild," which should brighten up a bit even the dreariest of Mondays. Peace out.

"Frost/Nixon" review

Say hello, good evening and welcome to one of the greatest political movies ever.

That bit of glorious hyperbole doesn't come from me, of course, but from the British tabloid The Sun. My sentiment would be, this was a pretty darn entertaining flick, but I really wish I could have seen the play.

The first question I always ask when I see a movie that's taken directly from the stage is, "did it gain anything in the transfer"? In this case, I'd say a conditional yes, with the big minus that it also adds one very unnecessary distraction.

Either at the urging of director Ron Howard or from the mind of playwright and screen writer Peter Morgan (I have no way of knowing which, frankly), the movie adds to the main dynamic of the buildup, actual showdown and aftermath of David Frost's interview with by then ex-President Richard Nixon a series of documentary-style, cut-in interviews with the other supporting players that only manages to take us out of the main story without adding any real insight or entertainment value.

Morgan, as he did with "The Queen" and his almost-as-good TV movie about Labor Party politics, "The Deal," is best at creating living history, and more specifically filling in the intimate details in the dynamic between historical figures who are much more alike than they originally know. Adding the mockumentary touches only dilutes the fact that he's written another whip-smart screenplay and handed it over to two first-rate actors, here as on stage, Michael Sheen and Frank Langella.

Sheen excels at playing characters, as he did with Tony Blair in both "The Queen" and "The Deal," who are in need of constant attention, seemingly aware of their own talents but still needing to have them reinforced time and time again. He captures perfectly just how insecure Frost was going into the Nixon interview (which he now claims cost $37 million pounds!), and the play's/movie's biggest strength is in naturally bringing out just how much Langella's Nixon felt the same way.

Mr. Langella has received a Best Actor nomination for his portrayal of Nixon, and it's well-deserved. It's no mean feat that he manages to make us almost feel sorry for Nixon without hedging one bit on the traits that brought about his fall from grace. Unlike Anthony Hopkins' portrayal of the former president in Oliver Stone's "Nixon," which I found far too often to be a caricature, you never see Langella as anything but Nixon's big ball of vanity, arrogance (of course) and, surprisingly, loneliness. It's that last trait that makes the final act of "Frost/Nixon" the best one, a quiet moment when Frost and Nixon meet several months later at Nixon's compound, La Casa Pacifica.

Which isn't saying that the pre-game action and the showdown itself lack the appropriate dramatic tension. Langella and Sheen (and, of course, Morgan) give their exchanges a wicked humor, but almost as much credit here should go to the uniformly solid supporting cast.

Similarly to "Man on Wire" (a better 2008 movie that, sort of, actually is a documentary), Morgan and Howard set up the staging of the interview as much as a heist than as any attempt at actual journalism. And any heist needs a solid slate of co-conspirators on either side, led here on the left by Sam Rockwell as Nixon antagoniste James Reston Jr. and on the right by Kevin Bacon as Nixon's post-White House chief of staff, Jack Brennan. They get the meatiest supporting parts because their convictions set up the main conflict at the movie's core, getting the truth vs. hiding it all costs, and they both just run with it. Toby Jones is (as usual) just a hoot as Nixon's "literary agent" Irving "Swifty" Lazar, and though I always like to see Rebecca Hall, she's given little to do here as Frost's girlfriend, Caroline Cushing.

In the end, I'd say Ron Howard's movie would have been great rather than very good if, like the superior "Doubt," it had had the courage to trust the inherent strength of its source work. As it is, it is indeed a nearly first-rate bit of political theater, but not for me in the category of Best Picture. If I had a vote, which so far exists only in my mind, I'd give that final slot to Darren Aronofsky for "The Wrestler" or Guillaume Canet for "Tell No One."

And now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to do my cooking for the week and then see Jonathan Demme's "Rachel Getting Married," which I'm really looking forward to. Peace out.

Who got the bigger Oscar shaft, The Boss, Batman or Dirty Harry?

Before I dive into anything about the Oscar nominations, the coolest thing I found this morning was actually casting news for what should be a rather wickedly good movie from Alfonso Cuaron.

The "Children of Men" director's next flick will probably be what the IMDB still calls an "Untitled Alfonso Cuaron Project," a small film about a family living in Mexico City in 1971, but I'm talking about what should come next.

"A Boy and His Shoe" is described as a road movie about young folks traveling throughout England, Scotland and France, and if you've seen "Y Tu Mama Tambien" (and if you haven't, why not?), you know the man knows a thing or two about road movies. And, even better, according to the Froggy film site Cinempire (if I have my rusty French right), he's recruited French everyman Daniel Auteil and Charlotte Gainsbourg to star in it.

Still best known so far as the daughter of iconic French crooner Serge Gainsbourg, Charlotte is turning into a fine actress herself. I've liked her ever since Claude Miller's "The Little Thief," and she and Heath Ledger together were easily the best thing about Todd Haynes' "I'm Not There," Cate Blanchett notwithstanding.

Anyways, enough about that. On to the Oscars ...

I was asked by my boss to write something handicapping the Oscars for the actual Telegraph newspaper, and I will about a week before the show or so, but for now just a few gripes, starting with the shoddy treatment of "The Dark Knight."

Now, I didn't put it in my top five for the year ("Milk," "Slumdog Millionaire," "The Wrestler," "Tell No One" and "Let the Right One In"), so I wasn't terribly surprised or upset to see it didn't get a Best Picture nomination, but I really would have liked to see a Best Director nomination for Christopher Nolan's accomplishment.

According to some fun facts compiled by Variety, this is rather amazingly only the fifth time that all five directors of the Best Picture nominees also got a Best Director nod, and I would usually say huzzah to that. It just seems to make sense.

This year, however, can you really tell me that Stephen Daldry, who has now received Best Director nominations for each of his first three films ("Billy Elliott, "The Hours" and now "The Reader"), is deserving of yet another nomination while Nolan is shut out for creating something as epically entertaining as "The Dark Knight"? Now, I haven't seen "The Reader," and I realize that makes my argument rather ludicrous, but this is my rant, so deal with it.

One of the two people who might have a bigger beef than Mr. Nolan would have to be Clint Eastwood, who I just assumed was entitled to a Best Picture nomination every time he sat in the director's chair, but this time got a big bucket of nothing for "Gran Torino."

Now, I would normally celebrate the death of this sense of entitlement, but I found "Gran Torino" to be more entertaining than any Eastwood-directed movie I've seen since "Bird." It took a while to grow on me, but for a reason that probably reflects poorly on me: I found myself laughing at the saltier of Walt Kowalski's racial slurs, and it just me extremely uncomfortable for a good portion of the flick.

That said, once I've had time to think about it, Eastwood's tale about his friendship with a Hmong family that moves in next door is a naturally entertaining tale, even if he is still a mortal enemy of subtlety (examples: Did they really have to play the military music every time he pointed a gun or, AND IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THE FLICK YET, PLEASE SKIP TO THE NEXT PARAGRAPH, have him lying in the shape of a cross at the end of the flick?)

Those are small quibbles about a flick that while, again shouldn't have gotten a Best Picture nomination, should have at least garnered either a Best Actor nod for him, an Adapted Screenplay nomination for Nick Schenk or, at the very least, a Best Song nomination for his graceful theme song that plays at the movie's finish.

And, to wrap this up with the biggest head-scratcher of all, how in the world did they end up only nominating three songs in the Best Original Song category, "Jai Ho" and "O Saya" from "Slumdog Millionaire" and "Down to Earth" from "Wall-E"? The double nod for A.R. Rahman's "Slumdog" work (he's also, rightfully, nominated for Best Original Score) probably means they will cancel each other out for a "Wall-E" victory (actually, the "Wall-E" nomination that just made me smile was Andrew Stanton, Pete Docter and Jim Reardon with Best Original Screenplay for a movie that mainly features robot dialogue. Priceless.)

But, getting back to the songs, did they just get tired after picking three and stop? Along with snubbing Clint Eastwood's jazzy piano tune, they also ignored Bruce Springsteen's soulful theme song for "The Wrestler," which also closes out Darren Aronofsky's movie and is one of the Boss's best songs in years.

OK, enough about that. If I had to handicap it, I'd say the Best Picture race will be a three-way heat between "Slumdog Millionaire," "Milk" and "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button," and I guess you could do worse than that (though I've expressed here before my distaste for "Benjamin Button.") In closing, here's a video montage from the flick set to Springsteen's tune, since, amazingly, "The Wrestler" is STILL not playing wide enough to reach into my little corner of the world this week (though we do finally get "Frost/Nixon," "Rachel Getting Married" and "Slumdog Millionaire," so I should probably just be thankful.) Enjoy the song, and have a perfectly pleasant weekend. Peace out.

Does Ben Kingsley really deserve this?

I love looking at the Razzies list each year because, even though it's done with a spirit too mean even for me, it reassures me that - despite much evidence to the contrary - I don't see every movie that comes out, just almost every one.

In fact, the only movies on this list that I saw last year were M. Night Shyamalan's "The Happening" and "Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull." I can't see any reason for Indy to be here, and now that I look back on it, I had a lot of fun watching M. Night's flick too.

Now, I'm not saying it's not bad, but I conditionally recommend renting it if you - like me - enjoy laughing at just how bad a movie can be. Just a taste: When Marky Mark and his entourage come upon a house full of infected folks who aren't in a particularly good mood, he actually sings a Doobie Brothers tune through a crack in the door to soothe them. I can't make this stuff up.

The only other beef I could possibly have with this list is the inclusion of Sir Ben Kingsley, but I guess after appearing in "The Love Guru" he only has himself to blame. "The Wackness," however is one that's near the top of my Netflix queue right now, and I'm really looking forward to it. Anyways, after seeing who actually gets the Oscar nominations this morning, enjoy these for a good laugh, and scroll to the end for a visit from Dr. Manhattan!

Worst Picture
* Disaster Movie
* The Happening
* The Hottie and the Nottie
* In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale
* The Love Guru
* Meet the Spartans

Worst Actor
* Larry the Cable Guy, Witless Protection
* Eddie Murphy, Meet Dave
* Mike Myers, The Love Guru
* Al Pacino, 88 Minutes and Righteous Kill
* Mark Wahlberg, The Happening and Max Payne

Worst Actress
* Jessica Alba, The Eye and The Love Guru
* The cast of The Women (Annette Bening, Eva Mendes, Debra Messing, Jada Pinkett-Smith and Meg Ryan)
* Cameron Diaz, What Happens in Vegas
* Paris Hilton, The Hottie and the Nottie
* Kate Hudson, Fool's Gold and My Best Friend's Girl

Worst Supporting Actor* Uwe Boll (as himself), Uwe Boll's Postal
* Pierce Brosnan, Mamma Mai!
* Ben Kingsley, The Love Guru and The Wackness
* Burt Reynolds, Deal and In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale
* Verne Troyer, The Love Guru and Uwe Boll's Postal

Worst Supporting Actress
* Carmen Electra, Disaster Movie and Meet the Spartans
* Paris Hilton, Repo: The Genetic Opera
* Kim Kardashian, Disaster Movie
* Jenny McCarthy, Witless Protection
* Leelee Sobieski, 88 Minutes and In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale

Worst Screen Couple
* Uwe Boll and Any Actor, Camera or Screenplay
* Cameron Diaz and Ashton Kutcher, What Happens in Vegas
* Paris Hilton and either Christin Lakin or Joel David Moore, The Hottie and the Nottie
* Larry the Cable Guy and Jenny McCarthy, Witless Protection
* Eddie Murphy and Eddie Murphy, Meet Dave

Worst Prequel, Remake, Rip-Off or Sequel
* The Day the Earth Blowed Up Real Good
* Disaster Movie and Meet the Spartans
* Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
* Speed Racer
* The Clone Wars

Worst Director
* Uwe Boll, 1968: Tunnel Rats, In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale and Uwe Boll's Postal
* Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer, Disaster Movie and Meet the Spartans
* Tom Putnam, The Hottie and the Nottie
* Marco Schnabel, The Love Guru
* M. Night Shyamalan, The Happening

Worst Screenplay* Disaster Movie and Meet the Spartans
* The Happening
* The Hottie and the Nottie
* In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale
* The Love Guru

Worst Career Achievement Razzie
* Uwe Boll

A visit from Dr. Manhattan

There's not much I can say about this except that 1) the good Dr. looks more than a little odd in his navy blue tighty-whities, and 2) I'm so happy that "Watchmen" is coming out so early in the year (in early March.) This fairly clever bit of viral marketing went up on this Watchmen site today, and it's here for you to enjoy too. Peace out.

Oscars predictions? Why not?

"George Bush is NOT the president ... we're alive! ... we actually made it!"
- Chris Rock

I certainly couldn't put it any better myself, so I'll just move on to something much, much more trivial. Along with the Oscar nominations coming tomorrow morning, there's evidence (though I can't yet call it proof) that Joss Whedon's horror movie might actually get made.

So, what is it? Well, it's called "Cabin in the Woods," and it was written (note, written, not will be written by Whedon and "Buffy the Vampire Slayer"/"Angel" veteran Drew Goddard, who penned my most surprisingly entertaining movie of 2008, "Cloverfield" (please note, that designation is far from best, as we'll get into soon; I simply mean the premise sounded simply awful but the flick is pretty darn good.)

And, not only will "Cabin in the Woods" most likely get made, it's even luring some quality inhabitants. Bradley Whitford, star of "The West Wing" and, unfortunately, "Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip," and even better, "The Visitor" and "Six Feet Under" star Richard Jenkins are on board for the project.

As for what it's about, details are scant, but Whedon did tell Variety that Whitford and Jenkins will play two white collar workers who visit the cabin, where I can only assume not terribly pleasant things will happen. Stay tuned to this.

Now, however, on to the main order of the day. The big question is: Will "The Dark Knight" get a nomination for Best Picture? I'll tackle that and the four acting categories (I simply don't have time to do the 10 categories that will be announced at 8:30 EST Thursday morning.)

I thought about just waiting until just before these are announced tomorrow or just saying "Who cares about the Oscars?" and moving on, but I still care about them, so here goes:

Best actress:

If I were a betting man, I'd say the nominees will be:
Cate Blanchett: Easily the best thing about "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button," even though that makeup they put on Brad Pitt was pretty cool too. This one's a lock.
Kate Winslet: Well, her name rhymes with weight, and she won two Golden Globes, so just pencil her in here for "Revolutionary Road," which is somehow finally playing in my little corner of the world this week.
Meryl Streep: I read an interview with Philip Seymour Hoffman in which he said Streep approaches acting like it's hand-to-hand combat, and you can certainly see that in "Doubt." I had no desire to see this one, but it's surprisingly good, and she is great in it.
Sally Hawkins The other Golden Globe-winning actress has the honor(?) of playing easily the most annoying role of the year in Mike Leigh's "Happy-Go-Lucky," and doing so with style. My pick for the deserved winner.
Anne Hathaway: I have yet to see "Rachel Getting Married," but my parents went into it expecting more of a comedy after hearing an interview with director Jonathan Demme on Fresh Air and were of course surprised by what they found. My pick for the actual winner.
Biggest snub: Hiam Abbass certainly deserves recognition for her performance as a mother trying to get her son out of prison in "The Visitor," but I can't really see it happening.

Best actor:

Mickey Rourke: I was hoping that Oscar nom week would bring - shocking idea - a movie about professional wrestling to the American South, but apparently not in my little corner of the world (but we do, thankfully, finally get "Frost/Nixon.") If you get to see this, you'll see what I think is the performance of the year because I simply couldn't see anyone else playing the role of Darren Aronofsky's wounded warrior in "The Wrestler." My pick for the deserved winner.
Sean Penn: Though Rourke took home the Golden Globe, I can't imagine Oscar voters in the end won't give their vote to Penn for his portrayal of Harvey Milk, and why not? Penn finds all the quirks of Milk's personality that made him such an odd choice for a civil rights pioneer, and delivers a remarkable performance.
Frank Langella: I'll be seeing "Frost/Nixon" finally Saturday afternoon, and I expect to see a commandingly creepy turn by Langella as Richard Nixon. 'Nuff said.
Richard Jenkins: Seeing Thomas McCarthy's "The Visitor" get any recognition at all would be great, and this is easily its best shot. Jenkins is a joy to watch as he slowly lets his Walter Vale re-engage with the world.
Brad Pitt: The weak link in this chain by far. He was certainly a marvel to watch as the young boy trapped in the body of an old man, but the more and more he just looked like a slightly confused Brad Pitt, the less engaged I became with "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button."
Biggest snub: If I had a vote, I'd give it to Jeffrey Wright for his sly and fierce turn as Muddy Waters in director Darnell Martin's "Cadillac Records," but I can't see that happening unless a lot of people look at their ballots just before submitting them and say, "geez, where are the black folks?"

Best supporting Actress:

Penelope Cruz: My pick for runner-up, Cruz is just manically funny and more than a little terrifying in Woody Allen's "Vicky Cristina Barcelona."
Viola Davis: My vote for the actual winner and should-be winner coincide here. No one took over a movie better than Ms. Davis did for the 10 minutes or so she was in "Doubt," and that's the definition of a supporting role. Simply stunning.
Amy Adams: Actually, what I want to see Amy Adams in is "Sunshine Cleaning," for which I've seen the trailer at least three times now. In "Doubt," she plays the young nun caught in the middle between Streep's accuser and Hoffman's accused, and just keeps us in the titular "Doubt" throughout the movie.
Marisa Tomei: If it weren't for Ms. Davis, I'd predict Tomei would be taking home her second Oscar this year for her performance as the not-yet-beaten-down dancer who befriends "The Wrestler."
Taraji P. Henson: Judging from all the trailers and some movies I've seen, Henson is turning into the "It" woman (not girl, of course) for black directors, with roles in Tyler Perry's "The Family that Preys" and the Tyler Perry rip-off "Not Easily Broken," directed by Bill Duke. She'll be nominated here for being one of the bright spots in "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button."
Biggest snub: In case any one's wondering, yes, I'm well aware that I repeat myself, but I'd vote for Beyonce as Etta James in "Cadillac Records." Yes, Beyonce.

Best supporting actor:

Heath Ledger: The definite winner, and deservedly so, for his chaotic takeover of the role of The Joker.
Robert Downey Jr.: Why in the world not a vote for comedy? I can't see Tom Cruise getting in here for "Tropic Thunder" like he did at the Golden Globes because, well, he just wasn't that funny. Downey, however, as mega-actor Kirk Lazarus, certainly was, so huzzah to that.
James Franco: The former "Freak" got a Golden Globe nomination for his delightfully goofy role as Saul the friendly pot dealer in "Pineapple Express," but he'll be nominated here for his work as Harvey Milk's lover Scott Smith. It's been quite a year for the former reluctant member of the McKinley High A.V. club.
Josh Brolin: I'd like to see him get a Best Actor nod for "W.," but the field is just too crowded. Instead this will be for his portrayal of troubled killer Dan White in "Milk," which just left us appropriately confused about what really drove White to commit his heinous acts.
Michael Shannon: To be honest, I know nothing about this, but there have to be five, so why not Mr. Shannon for "Revolutionary Road"?
Biggest snub: Eddie Marsan is just a simmering pot of rage in "Happy-Go-Lucky," and once he boils over its unforgettable, so his name should certainly be called tomorrow morning, but won't.

Best Picture:

OK, here it is. I'd say the best predictor is to look at the Director's Guild nominees, which were: Danny Boyle for "Slumdog Millionaire," Gus Van Sant for "Milk," Ron Howard for "Frost/Nixon," Christopher Nolan for "The Dark Knight," and David Fincher for "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button."

Is that right? I'd say almost. Although I'd certainly like to see it, I don't think "The Dark Knight" will make the cut. The Academy, as a rule, doesn't usually anoint more than one movie that's at least as fun as it is "good," and I think that slot goes to "Slumdog Millionaire."

So, if "The Dark Knight" is out, what's in? I see four contenders: Sam Mendes' "Revolutionary Road," Darren Aronofsky's "The Wrestler" (huzzah!), Andrew Stanton's "Wall-E," or Clint Eastwood's "Gran Torino." Of those, I predict Clint's movie will be the dark horse that just sneaks in the gate, so the big five will be:

"Slumdog Millionaire"
"Milk"
"The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"
"Frost/Nixon"
"Gran Torino"

If I had to pick a winner today, I'd say "Milk," and I'd certainly be OK with that. Here, if I had a vote, would be my top five for the year:


"Slumdog Millionaire": I threw up a little in my mouth when I read this morning about how Mr. Boyle had to defend his movie in Mumbai after some idiot called it "poverty porn." I don't even know what that could possibly mean, but Boyle's movie is lively, fun and thoroughly enchanting, and that's enough for me.
"Let the Right One In": Please, please, please see this in its original form when it comes to DVD instead of waiting for the American version. This Swedish gem is as much a coming of tale as it is a suitably scary vampire flick, and just an all-around winner.
"Milk": Gus Van Sant's movie deals a lot more with the small details of San Francisco politics than I expected, and therefore could have been a real snooze, but it certainly never is. Instead, it's a celebration of Harvey Milk's life that's full of warmth and, of course, tragedy.
"Tell No One": I want to resist saying "they just don't make them like this anymore," but I'm afraid I have to. Guillaume Canet takes what easily could have been another by-the-numbers thriller and instead turns Harlan Coben's novel into the best mind-bender of the year.
"The Wrestler": Darren Aronofsky's flick sticks to the structure of the sports underdog flick but gives its hero a truly scary foe: Any semblance of an actual life. A professional wrestling movie as one the year's five best? Believe it.

So, there you have it. Tune in for the Oscar nominations tomorrow morning at 8:30 EST, and please feel free to tell me if I've snubbed any actor, actress or movie in particular. Peace out.