It's Tuesday morning, so let the hate flow

I normally try not to get in the business of telling people not to see movies that I haven't and won't, but the fact there's only one this week - and what it is - just has me in a fairly cranky mood to start the day, so bear with me.

I always knew this week was going to be a hole in what otherwise is just a sensational month for movies. Already, of course, there's "Star Trek," which I'm almost certain to see again this weekend. Next week comes "Terminator: Salvation," for which you can count me thoroughly jazzed, and then Pixar's "Up" and Sam Raimi's "Drag Me to Hell" (but not, apparently, dammit, Rian Johnson "The Brothers Bloom.")

In between, however, all we get is "Angels & Demons." Now, for reasons I'll keep to myself, I will never, ever read a Dan Brown book or see one of his movies, but let me see if I have this plot summary right. After the Pope is murdered, the four Preferiti, or candidates to replace him, are also slain. Is this really anyone's idea of pleasant Summertime entertainment? Sheesh. Here's hoping against hope that this somehow makes a grand total of about $100 worldwide.

And, in the spirit of hating, which can actually be more than a little fun, here's a word or two about one I did see last weekend, so I guess you can call this a cautionary tale. Here goes:


I should have known "Next Day Air" was going to be a disaster when I saw it called, in separate places, both "the black Pineapple Express" and "the black Lock, Stock and Two Smokin' Barrels."

Now, I guess the bigger question would be why we would need either of those, but for right now, I can just tell you "Next Day Air" just falls miserable short of both. Not even Donald Faison, Wood Harris (Avon Barksdale on "The Wire") and Mos Def (who wisely only spends about five minutes total in this train wreck), all of whom I like a whole lot, were enough to give this flick either an ounce of comedic charm or dramatic urgency. Lacking both, it's a grim affair, and much more importantly, just incredibly boring. Avoid this one at all costs. I sure wish I had.

Actually, I guess just about everyone already has since it made a grand total of about $4 million. I give it one more week, and the filmmakers only have themselves to blame, because I really can't think of a movie I was looking forward to more that's just so completely lacking in anything that could even come close to being called entertainment value.

The premise, which I knew going in, can only generously be called tired. Faison, playing a spliffed-out delivery guy, delivers a package of narcotics to the wrong address. To that, the movie adds almost no comedy and really no further story, hence why it has no relation AT ALL to "Lock, Stock" and even less to "Pineapple Express." Debbie Allen shows up for about two minutes and tries very hard to be funny, as does Mos Def, but they both wisely bail very quickly. I guarantee that if you do somehow manage to see this, Mos' line in the commercial, "I like your outfit," is just about the only one that will make you even snicker.

And you can call me a devoted fan of "stylized violence," but the bullet ballet that closes out "Next Day Air" forgot one key element: Any kind of style. It just mercifully puts this instantly forgettable flick to bed in just under 90 minutes, which in my book amounts to a mercy killing. Peace out.

Remember Sofia Coppola? She's back ...

It's really funny that this turned up this morning, since one of the many things that has passed through my too-active imagination recently while it was trying to avoid any actual work was what in the world ever happened to Sofia Coppola?

It's been three years since "Marie Antoinette," and I have to say that, for me at least, that one just left a bad taste in my mouth. I dragged my brother to see it in Amsterdam while we were taking a side trip from the 2006 World Cup in Germany, and perhaps if we had sampled a bit of the local product beforehand I would have enjoyed it more. As it was, the flick had style to spare, but it was certainly signifying nothing, and I just couldn't get into it one bit.

All that, said, however, I still have a lot of time for Sofia Coppola, because I count her first two flick among my favorites, and of how many directors can you really say you like two-thirds of their movies? "The Virgin Suicides" and "Lost in Translation" were both much more intimate affairs than "Marie Antoinette," and each represented just a moment in time as much as they did a dream. And it sounds like what she's up to now (yes, I will get to it very soon) could be a return to form.

Much as "Lost in Translation" centered on the Park Hyatt hotel in Tokyo, Coppola's next flick, "Somewhere," will take place at the iconic Chateau Marmont in Hollywood. Stephen Dorff will play "a bad-boy actor stumbling through a life of excess," and Elle Fanning (who I have to assume is some kind of relation to Dakota) will play his daughter who visits to interrupt his reverie.

The flick, which was also written by Coppola, is set to start shooting in June in L.A. and Italy, so to that I can only say welcome back.

Why I love Blackfilm.com

Well, there are many reasons, actually, but a big one is that they simply cover movies that get ignored by most of the world earlier and much more extensively.

Case in point: I had never heard of a flick called "Next Day Air," a comedy set to be released very wide May 8. Directed by rap video helmer Benny Boom, it's an ensemble comedy that's clearly in the vein of "Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels" and starring Donald Faison of "Scrubs" and Mos Def, easily one of my favorite actors.

Why in the world wouldn't I be interested in that? Anyways, enjoy the trailer, and certainly go see this one when it comes out soon.



"It's just a dragon-looking wild thing"

Can you imagine how happy Warner Brothers must have been when they found out their "Where the Wild Things Are" flick was gonna get a free endorsement of sorts from no less than Barack Obama? The Spike Jonze flick is finally set to come out in October, but in the meantime, enjoy this seriously fun reading of my favorite children's book by Mr. Obama at the White House Easter Egg Roll, and I defy you to not just smile broadly.



"Bruno" somehow gets an R rating

Even after pointing out that it still has "pervasive, strong and crude sexual content, graphic nudity and language" (one can certainly hope so!), the MPAA has still rescinded the NC-17 rating given to Sacha Baron Cohen's next flick, centering on the Austrian fashion reporter Bruno, and awarded it an R rating. This is one I'm certainly looking forward to seeing in July, but for now just enjoy this new promotional pic and have a perfectly pleasant weekend. If you'll excuse me, I'm off to the Atlanta Film Festival 365, and rather excited about it. Peace out.