Emblematic of this summer: A 9 percent fresh flick

How bad have the movies been this summer? This morning, I was struck by two signs.

First, the idea that "Jonah Hex" would be this year's first (that I know of) "zero percent fresh" movie at Rotten Tomatoes. Think about that for a second. Of all the people in the world who call themselves critics, they couldn't find one to say this comic book flick starring Josh Brolin and Megan Fox doesn't just suck?

By this morning, however, it was up to a more robust 9 percent fresh, with three or so "positive" reviews, one of which had the following summarizing phrase: "You could do worse than this and if you have been going to the movies this summer with any regularity, you most likely already have." Nothing like a ringing endorsement, eh?

And secondly, the Hollywood Reporter, in apparent seriousness, ran the following headline: "Early Oscar Contenders Scarce." Really? Having seen my fair share of stinkers already this year, I didn't have to take the time to read that article.

However, I do still try to be a glass half full kinda guy, and along with the U.S.A. playing Slovenia this morning in the World Cup, there is, on the opposite end of the spectrum, a "100 percent fresh" movie opening this weekend, Pixar's annual offering, "Toy Story 3." The closest thing I've seen to criticism of that so far is that it's a roller-coaster ride that never lets up. Sounds like summer to me, and I'll be going to see it in glorious 2-D (because I already wear glasses, and don't need to pay $3 more or so just for a second pair, thank you very much) this afternoon.

And speaking of potentially great movies, Edgar Wright's "Scott Pilgrim Vs. the World" just keeps looking better and better as they keep releasing trailers. I suppose it could be overload by the time this finally opens in August, but with as thoroughly fun as it looks to be, I'm nowhere near that point yet. My favorite line in this latest international trailer: "Prepare to die, obviously." Enjoy, watch the U.S.A. this morning, and have a perfectly pleasant weekend. Peace out.

Aaron Sorkin steps to the plate to revive a baseball flick

Some guy in Idaho just tweeted that I’ve ruined cinema. Already? Had no idea I was so hugely influential. Suck it, Truffaut!

I'm not a tweeter or a tweet follower, and I'm 100 percent certain I can make it through the rest of my life just fine that way, but I saw that post from Diablo Cody yesterday and just thought it was very funny.

And with that, let's get right into what's a pretty full day of good news, capped off by visits from Craig Robinson and Megan Fox, because he's very funny and she's .. well, you know.

First up is what is quickly becoming the best ensemble cast of 2010 in director David Gordon Green's "Your Highness." Though "Observe and Report" was just a muddled mess, I'm still convinced that Green, Jody Hill, Ben Best and Danny McBride are leading a real Southern comedy resurgence (and on a side note, fellow cubicle slave Randy Waters told me yesterday that he bought "Eastbound and Down" but really couldn't get into it at all, so he's gonna give it to me for free ... good times!)

Best and McBride have written the script for "Your Highness," which stars McBride as a lazy prince who must complete a heroic quest to save his father's kingdom, and in a "Pineapple Express" reunion of sorts, James Franco plays his more heroic brother. Natalie Portman is already on board as McBride's love interest, a warrior princess, and just announced is Zooey Deschanel, who plays Belladonna, Franco's character's virginal bride.

I think you'll agree that's just a whale of a good cast. It's all being filmed in Northern Ireland beginning later this month, so you can definitely count this as one 2010 flick I'm thoroughly jazzed for.

In other, especially good, news for fans of "Let the Right One In" (and if you're not, rent it today and I guarantee you will be), Tomas Alfredson, the director of that fantastic coming-of-age horror flick, has set his sights on a great choice for his next movie.

If you haven't seen the '70s miniseries "Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy," which starred Alec Guinness and also the late, great Ian Richardson, certainly see it if you can, and be happy that Alfredson is now set to turn it into a feature film. Peter Morgan will write the script for the cold-war thriller about a spy-hunt in the British Secret Intelligence Service.

Though I have no time at all for the English language version of "Let the Right One In" being cooked up by "Cloverfield" mastermind Matt Reeves, Alfredson breaking into the Hollywood big time is only great news, so definitely keep your eyes on this one.

And, in the last tidbit before we get to what was supposed to be the main course, "The Hangover" director Todd Phillips has set his next two flicks, and they're both set to star veryfunnyman Zach Galifianakis. Though the plot wasn't nearly as salacious or inventive as it thought it was, I still almost thoroughly enjoyed "The Hangover," and it's certainly a reason to cheer when an at least fairly intelligent R-rated comedy makes such a yachtload of cash at the box office. (As an aside, at $210 million domestic and still counting, "The Hangover" has surpassed "Wedding Crashers" to become the second-highest grossing R-rated comedy of all time - the original "Beverly Hills Cop" is still No. 1 in that subcategory at north of $234 million.)

For their next collaboration, Phillips and Galifianakis will make a road-trip comedy (sense a pattern here?) titled "Due Date" in which an expectant dad and his unlikely travel companion (Galifianakis, natch) race cross country to make it home for the birth of the rugrat. After that, there will be, by sheer force of nature, a "Hangover 2."

Sounds like more than a little bit of a rut to me, but I have to admit, as long as they keep making comedies that are both reliably crude and clever enough, they'll keep getting my money.

But when I started out today, this was supposed to be about the resuscitation of a flick that had been pretty much left for dead. And since it's a baseball flick, that's certainly noteworthy news.

For anyone unfamiliar with the saga so far, director Steven Soderbergh had been plotting a movie based on Michael Lewis' book "Moneyball," about Oakland A's bean counter and big brain Billy Beane, who would be played by Brad Pitt.

All well and good, right? Well, not exactly. Just days before the movie was set to start shooting, Sony pulled the plug because it wasn't impressed with a script retooling Soderbergh had done to a previous version by Steven Zaillian.

In a bit of hyperbole that nonetheless touched on the truth, this prompted the New York Times to opine that this may be a broader danger sign for "tricky but appealing" movies, in a piece you can read here. Even if that's a bit of an exaggeration, the death of a potentially good baseball flick is reason enough to be blue for me.

But now, thanks to Aaron Sorkin, and I'd imagine the pull of Brad Pitt, the project is back on.

Soderbergh is out, but Sony has Sorkin in to do a draft of the script, starting with what Zaillian finished, for Pitt to still star in. Great news all around there for just about everyone except Mr. Soderbergh, I'd say. Everyone knows Sorkin's track record with "The West Wing" and the much-too-brief "Sports Night," but for a recent example of his work to prove he's still got a lot of wit left to work with, I'd strongly recommend renting "Charlie Wilson's War," which would be a great bit of satire if it weren't all based on the even crazier truth.

And though I still can't find a DVD release date for it yet, the single best movie I've seen so far in 2009 (mid-season report card coming after Judd Apatow's "Funny People" drops July 31) just happens to be a baseball movie of sorts, Anna Boden and Ryan Fleck's "Sugar." See that one as soon as you can.

And anyone who's made it this far certainly deserves a reward, and I've got three of what I think qualify.

First is one of eight teasers (in French, malheuresement) for Jean Pierre Jeunet's next crazy flick, "Micmacs à tire-larigot." Like I said, they're pretty aurally useless for those who don't speak French (and I only barely do at this point), but you can still see from the look of this that the tale of a man and his friends who come up with an intricate and original plan to destroy two big weapons manufacturers will have all the spirit of his best work, "Amelie" and "Delicatessen." You can count this, along with Spike Jonze's "Where the Wild Things Are," as the two flicks I'm most looking forward to for the rest of this year, and you can watch seven more of these brief character teasers courtesy of Twitch Film here. Enjoy.



And, next-to-finally, this Funny or Die clip, though it's a little to slow to get going and way too crude to be enjoyed at work without headphones, shows why Craig Robinson is the most underappreciated member of both "The Office" and Apatow's crew. My inner 8-year-old will always appreciate songs about where to post naked pictures of your girlfriend, so in that spirit, enjoy.



And really finally, in something I'm certain Mr. Robinson would enjoy, here's a certain someone known as Megan Fox in the first teaser poster for the Diablo Cody horror-comedy "Jennifer's Body." Enjoy, and have a great weekend. Peace out.

Yes, a shameless glimpse of Jennifer's not-surprisingly-hot body

When you've got nothing but two pretty good trailers for a Tuesday, you might as well go ahead and sell it with a headline like that.

Anyways, first up is a glimpse of what it girl Diablo Cody has been doing since "Juno." Actually, she also wrote a series for Showtime (I think) called "The United States of Tara," which may or may not still be on the air. I watched one episode and just wasn't terribly impressed.

This, however, looks like it has real potential if you like humor and horror, and you can put me down for both. There's not much else I can say to sell this, so here's, yes, Megan Fox, Amanda Seyfried and even Adam Brody in the trailer for "Jennifer's Body." Enjoy.



This next one, though it will almost certainly never play anywhere near my little corner of the world, looks even better. Starring Patton Oswalt and written by Robert D. Siegel (who, with "The Wrestler," wrote easily one of my favorite movies of 2008), "Big Fan" is about the danger of being, well, a big fan. I'm not sure this is the right word, but enjoy, and have a perfectly passable Tuesday. Peace out.

Diablo Cody is the voice of ... what?

I don't get Showtime - and have, in fact, never before now seen a Showtime show - but I do get Hulu (not a very exclusive feat, I concede) and have therefore seen Diablo Cody's new show, "The United States of Tara."

The show itself was a little better than I expected, but the funniest thing of all was the promo clip about Ms. Cody on the Showtime site. Now, I'm all for self-promotion (well, actually, I've never been very good at it at all), but this was enough to - really - make me do a spit take with my still very hot coffee Sunday morning.

In it, yarnhead Brie Larson, who plays Toni Collette's yarnhead daughter on the show, actually said this, and I don't think she was joking: "Diablo Cody is the voice of our generation ... blah, blah, blah ... I can't even speak to her."

Really? Granted I'm more than a little older than Ms. Larson, but I'll take, maybe, Barack Obama.

Even so, like I said the show is pretty good, and I have the sense it's going to get better. The only problem (and, yes, I guess it's a pretty big one) is the premise and how Toni Collette fits into it. Her multiple personalities are gross caricatures, and she looks so uncomfortable doing it that you get the feeling she's well aware of that. The rest of the characters, however, are fairly well drawn for a pilot episode, and I think Collette will get better as the show goes on, so assuming Showtime will keep letting me watch them for free, I'll keep doing so for at least a few more.

If you haven't seen it, there are certainly worse ways to spend your lunch hour than going here and doing so today.

As for Diablo Cody, if I have my French right (and I'm pretty sure I do), she has her ever-roving eye set next apparently on Shakespeare (and, since you're a writer who's almost as clever as you think you are, why not Shakespeare)?

According to the fantastic Froggy film site Cinempire, now that "Jennifer's Body" (in which, if I may be as piggish as possible, the titular "Body" belongs to the rather appropriately named Megan Fox) is in postproduction, she's going to write a modern version of "La Mégère apprivoisée," which is apparently the French title for "Taming of the Shrew."

My first reaction was, wasn't that done already on a sublimely silly episode of "Moonlighting"? Sheesh. As for Cinempire, even if you can't read French (and I really can't all that well anymore), it's still worth checking out. They report movie news like a lot of folks, but are quick to pounce on tidbits about filmmakers like Atom Egoyan or Pedro Almodovar, who don't usually get much attention from your average geeks. Plus, you can, if you really want to, see the poster for the upcoming Festival du Cinéma Espagnol de Nantes.

"Mad Men" finally gets its main man

Actually, I guess that would be Jon Hamm, who I have to assume is smart enough to never walk away from this series before it comes to its rightful end, but "Mad Men" really wouldn't be the same again if creator/mastermind Matthew Weiner had. Well, fortunately, that's not anything we have to worry about (so I can instead worry about whether or not my car can last until I have time to take it to my beloved mechanic Thursday morning.)

Word came down late Friday that Weiner had indeed signed a two-year deal with Lionsgate that will keep him on board through four of the show's projected five seasons. I can only imagine he's gonna hold out for real before signing a rather fat deal for the last hurrah.

The best news is that, according to Variety, along with a seven-figure payday for himself, Weiner was also holding out for - and received - a big boost for the show's budget. Now that he's on board, writing on season three is set to start immediately. Bring it on!

Easily the coolest thing I've seen today

Actually, this is so good I probably should have lead with it. Anyone who's been here before (and there are apparently a few of you, thankfully) knows that there's no movie that may never even come out I like to talk about more than Spike Jonze's "Where the Wild Things Are."

It now has a release of Oct. 16, 2009, and until I get to see the final project I'll still have doubts that Warner Bros. will let Mr. Jonze release the movie in anything approaching his original cut, which is apparently more than a little (appropriately, I think) warped. For now, we get a glimpse - courtesy of /film, where you can see more - of just how twisted his Wild Things might be, on these promotional skateboards Jonze plans to release through his Girl Skateboards Company. Though I tried my hand at skating as a kid, I was never terribly good at it (and, if I can confess, preferred roller-skating), but I think even I would learn a few moves for something as cool as this. Enjoy!


And, finally, a NSFW trailer

Although I kind of enjoyed Jason Segel's "Forgetting Sarah Marshall," I also found it too short on laughs and too long on conventionality (though that "Dracula" puppet show at the end was a hoot). It's biggest crime was it wasted veryfunnyman Paul Rudd in a simply annoying role as a stoned out surfing instructor.

Thankfully, Rudd takes the lead role in the March 20 comedy "I Love You, Man," and he's surrounding by a first-rate comedy cast: Segel, Jamie Pressly of "My Name is Earl", Rashida Jones of "The Office", Jon Favreau, Andy Samberg and J.K. Simmons, who can make me laugh without saying a word. The trailer below is plenty funny, but be warned: It's also plenty rude, so please wear headphones if you're gonna watch it at work, and have a perfectly passable Monday.

Where are they now: Gilmore Girls

Sure, there's movie news out there today. The best I could find is that after "Juno" finally comes out around the world, Jason Reitman will team up with Diablo Cody again for her next script, which just sounds perfectly insane.

Reitman will produce (and I assume direct) "Jennifer's Body," Cody's horror-comedy about a killer cheerleader, to be played, naturally, by the rather appropriately named Megan Fox of "Transformers" fame.

Specifically, "Body" tells the story of a cheerleader who is possessed by a demon and starts feeding off the boys in a Minnesota farming town. Her "plain Jane" best friend must kill her, then escape from a correctional facility to go after the Satan-worshiping rock band responsible for the transformation. Sounds similar to what often goes on my dreams, actually.

Reitman's company, Hard C, is also behind Rainn Wilson's (Dwight Schrute, of course) flick "Bonzai Shadowhands," which will answer the burning question: What does a ninja do during his downtime?

And in the meantime, "Juno" is still listed as opening at least a few places Dec. 5, so maybe that means we'll get it before the end of the year out here in the hinterlands.

But what I really wanted to talk about, in honor of the rather ignominious end of "Gilmore Girls" hitting DVD this week with the seventh season coming out, was a "where are they now" about the main cast members of a show that I just loved. Besides, there's actual news out today about adorable Alexis Bledel, so why not? Here goes ...

Lorelia Gilmore
I was talking with a co-worker the other day about Christmas movies, and I of course pitched "Bad Santa," which was dismissed as too dark for her tastes. That, however, quickly digressed into talk about whether Lauren Graham's ever gonna get to star in a good movie, or at least one where she gets to do more than f*** Santa. A quick IMDB check, unfortunately, points to no. Her only upcoming credit, for 2008, is something called "Flash of Genius," starring Greg Kinnear as a guy who takes on the Detroit automakers who claim he stole their idea of the intermittent windshield wiper. What this makes Lorelai, I suppose, is once again the wife. Can't anyone write anything better for this great actress? Sheesh.

Rory Gilmore
The news is at least a little better for fans of Alexis Bledel, since she at least gets to topline movies, even if they do sound awfully familiar. She's just signed to play the lead in a Fox Atomic comedy called "Ticket to Ride," in which she will play a college grad who is forced to move back into her childhood home with her eccentric family. Any similarities to Greg Mottola's upcoming "Adventureland," in which Jesse Eisenberg will do essentially the same thing, are supposed to be overlooked, I suppose. Before that, she'll also be reprising her role as Lena in the sequel to Warner Bros.' "The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants," along with America Ferrera, Blake Lively and Amber Tamblyn.

Luke Danes
Scott Patterson landed quickly back on TV as one of the main stars of the CW's "Aliens in America," the only new sitcom funny enough to keep me watching this fall (and it seems to get better with each week.) Though I didn't see it to find out, he apparently also had some kind of role in "Saw IV." I guess a man's gotta eat.

Emily Gilmore
Did anyone know that Kelly Bishop actually won a Tony award in 1976, for Featured Actress in a Musical for her work as Sheila in "A Chorus Line"? I didn't until I was alerted to it by always-welcome reader Jeremy. Sadly, this truly classy broad has no work listed at the IMDB. How can that be?

Richard Gilmore
Long before he classed up "Gilmore Girls," Edward Herrmann could actually list "Lost Boys" among his many credits, playing, for those who can remember, the key role of Max. Post-"GG" he's had a stint on the sudsy "Grey's Anatomy" (which I don't watch) and then is listed for what must be a straight-to-DVD flick. Starring (I'm not making this up) Tom Arnold and Timothy Daly, "The Skeptic" is described thusly at the IMDB: "A man separates from his wife and young child and moves into a large Victorian house where strange, frightening occurrences take place. The question which teases the alert audience throughout this psychological thriller: Is this a haunting or a descent into madness!" (believe me, the exclamation point wasn't my addition.) Coincidentally, Richard Herrmann won a Tony Award in the same year as Kelly Bishop, for Featured Actor in a Play for his work in George Bernard Shaw's "Mrs. Warren's Profession."

Sookie St. James
Melissa McCarthy also landed right back on TV in a show I don't watch, "Samantha Who?" Judging from the commercials I've seen, the running joke on the show seems to be whether or not Kelly Bundy can call herself a virgin again now that she suffers from amnesia, but maybe the show has more subtle charms I'm just missing. McCarthy is also listed as one of the main stars of a movie called "Pretty Ugly People," which didn't even warrant a plot synopsis at the IMDB.

Michel St. Gerard
Yanic Truesdale, who played a snobby French Canadian so well because he is, well, a French Canadian, unfortunately has no acting credits listed after "Gilmore Girls."

Lane Kim
Keiko Agena and Emily Kuroda played my favorite "Gilmore Girls" characters, Lane Kim and her constantly watchful mother, known only as Mrs. Kim. Since "GG" wrapped, Keiko has voiced the character of Yori on Disney's "Kim Possible," but from there I'm afraid the news is not good. I've managed to make it until now without making any mention of "Major Movie Star," but since she has a small part in it I guess I have to. In a plot summary that, believe me, I couldn't possibly make up, Jessica Simpson will reach to play a ditsy movie star who, after getting in a car accident, somehow manages to enlist in the Army. Remember folks, I'm just the messenger.

Kirk Gleason
The only time I can remember seeing Sean Gunn's name in the news recently was when his brother and sister-in-law, James "Troma" Gunn and Jenna "America's sweetheart" Fischer announced they were getting a divorce. His only acting credit listed is for something called "Pants on Fire," which I can only hope is some kind of comedy.

Paris Geller
Though one of the many charms of "Gilmore Girls" was its outstanding ensemble cast, I've decided to wrap it up here at an even 10 with a look at Liza Weil. Long before "Gilmore Girls," she starred in what is still one of my favorite movies that no one has ever seen, Susan Skoog's great coming-of-age movie "Whatever," and now she's surprisingly busy. She has three upcoming credits listed at the IMDB: "Mars," an animated comedy about the discovery of life on the Red Planet and our race to land there; "Little Fish, Big Pond," which I know nothing about except for that it stars Matthew Modine; and "The Missing Person," which I can only assume is about, well, a missing person.

I could go on a lot longer with this, of course, but everybody knows that two of Rory's main beaus, Milo Ventamiglia and Jared Padalecki, can be seen each week on "Heroes" and "Supernatural," respectively. So, I'll leave you instead with this rather freakin' cool pic of Benicio del Toro all decked out as Che Guevara for Steven Soderbergh's "The Argentine," taken directly from his own fairly odd Web site, which you can find here. Peace out.