Steven Soderbergh's porn movie? Well, not quite ...

Am I really the only person who saw the news footage of folks "tea-bagging" yesterday and just thought how much funnier - and about as equally effective - it would have been using the John Waters definition? Just saying.

And in that spirit, in movie news that's not nearly as salacious as some might be thinking, the first trailer for Steven Soderbergh's movie starring porn star Sasha Grey as a rather high-priced call girl - "The Girlfriend Experience" - has hit, and it looks like it has been made with the clinical detachment that has marked even his best flicks. (And if you want to see some of her work, well, this is the Internet, so I suppose that wouldn't be too hard to accomplish. Since this is a family-friendly site, I've simply included her picture.)

For me, his style works when he's using it in the pursuit of cool, since "Out of Sight" and "The Limey" are just two nearly perfect little flicks. But it can also go way wrong when it has no leash. Witness "Che." Or, for your sake, take my advice and don't.

When I was in New York with my family at the end of last year, I somehow got it into my head that watching all five hours or so of "Che" parts one and two in one day would be entertaining, and somehow also duped my brother into going with me.

Man, was that painful to watch. It's a movie that's much easier to admire, for me, than it ever was to enjoy. For EXTREMELY long chunks, especially during the second part that takes place in Bolivia, it's essentially a training film in guerilla warfare, filmed in thorough detail with tons of precision but scant passion, even with the great Benicio del Toro in the titular role.

Oh well, I digress quite a bit. Here's the trailer for his new flick, which is set to have what I assume will be a rather limited release May 22:



Errol Morris goes narrative

And in surprising news about a director who never lacks passion for his subjects, documentary maker Errol Morris is jumping into narrative features with a tale about cryogenics, which would seem to be right up his alley.

He's perhaps best known for the Robert McNamara documentary "Fog of War," but my favorite Morris flicks are just studies in extreme oddity like the creepy "Mr. Death" and, even better, "Fast, Cheap and Out of Control." And what he comes up with for this dark comedy being written by Zach Helm should fit in with those characters just fine.

Inspired by both Robert F. Nelson's memoir "We Froze the First Man" and a story that aired on NPR's "This American Life" this week titled "You're as Cold as Ice," the true story centers on Nelson, a TV repairman who in the 1960s joined a group of enthusiasts who believed they could cheat death with a new technology: cryonics. But freezing dead people so scientists could reanimate them in the future turned out to be harder than Nelson thought.

If this all works out, it might just add up to the oddest thing from Errol Morris yet: A movie that might even reach theaters in my little corner of the world!

A glimpse of "The Hurt Locker"

Remember Kathryn Bigelow? She made a quick splash with the Keanu Reeves flick "Point Break" in 1991 and then, of course, tried to end the world with "End of Days," but instead just about ended her movie-directing career (to be fair, she did direct three episodes of easily one of my favorite TV shows, "Homicide," and even one of the short-lived and much-underappreciated "Out of Sight" TV version of sorts "Karen Sisco" with the always-welcome Carla Gugino.)

And now she's back with an Iraq war movie (another one?) that promises perhaps the same level of action of her early flicks on a much less grand scale.

Although I enjoyed "In the Valley of Elah" quite a bit and wanted to like Kimberly Pierce's "Stop-Loss" a lot more than I actually did, I don't think there's been an Iraq war movie yet that's managed to catch on with the moviegoing public. Bigelow's flick, however, just might be the first to break that mold, since "The Hurt Locker" seems to simply focus on the lives of the members of an elite Army bomb squad operating in Iraq and let you bring your own politics into the action.

Here's the trailer for the flick starring Jeremy Renner and Anthony Mackie, which is set to open in at least a few corners of the world at the end of June.



And in a quick thought about TV, I have to say I thoroughly enjoyed the premiere episode of "Parks and Recreation," even if it does crib most of its style directly from "The Office." It just seems to be infused, at least so far, with the right mix of genuine spirit and just thoroughly mocking it, and I certainly liked Amy Poehler's character a whole lot more than any she's played since that crazy RA in "Undeclared."

Here's hoping the show just gets funnier, because I thought that, even with the double "Office" episodes last week, it was the best thing in NBC's Thursday night lineup. And here's about two-and-a-half minutes or so of what you'll see on tonight's episode, "Canvassing," and as a bonus, more footage of "The Office" crew playing soccer. Priceless. Peace out.

Merry Christmas to all, and movies for me!

I'm obviously far from alone in declaring the Christmas week to be my favorite time of year, but I may be the only person who says that but still has to work on both Christmas Eve day and Christmas. Not a complaint, mind you, because come Boxing Day I'm off to NYC, which means spending five days with my parents and brother and, of course, a heck of a lot of movies.

There are bound to be some surprises that I'm not aware of yet, especially since we're arriving on the last opening Friday of the year, but here are the seven movies I most want to see, assuming they're still playing somewhere in the city (and, on a side note, how in the world did Rian Johnson's "Brothers Bloom" get pushed back to the end of May? I was really looking forward to seeing that one right about now.) Here goes:

"Happy-Go-Lucky"
On paper this sounds about as appealing as a Tony Robbins seminar, but I'll trust Mike Leigh to turn it into something twistedly appealing. Sally Hawkins plays a schoolteacher whose constant optimism irks everyone around her, which actually sounds right up my alley.

"Synecdoche, NY"
I have a feeling this will be the one I see first, since my parents are arriving before mi hermano (who has already seen it), and I'm really looking forward to it. Oddly enough, Philip Seymour Hoffman's other cheerful holiday flick, "Doubt," is surprisingly opening Friday at a multiplex down in my little corner of the world, so that one will definitely be off the NY menu. For a great read on Mr. Hoffman, check out the profile from last Sunday's New York Times Magazine (which I tried and failed to link to, but you can easily find yourself.)

"Milk"
I was having a discussion with a co-worker and fellow movie devotee yesterday, and I was surprised to hear him say he just can't stand Sean Penn. He compared him to Al Pacino in that they each shout and over emote a lot, but while I can see it with Mr. Pacino, I can't go there with Sean Penn. He just has tremendous range, and you can tell from the trailer for "Milk" that he and director Gus Van Sant found the joy in Harvey Milk's life that came before the tragedy, and I can't wait to see what they came up with here.

"Frost/Nixon"
Apparently wide doesn't mean wide at all, or this one would be entering the fray even in my little corner of the world with the other 10 million flicks opening everywhere on Christmas day. Since it's not, I'll probably catch it in NYC for Frank Langella's performance as tricky Dick and because I have full faith in Peter Morgan and Michael Sheen. By the way, I rented "The Deal," a k a their other Tony Blair flick, the other day, and it's almost as good as "The Queen." Check it out.

"Che"
Despite the certain numbness it will bring to my posterior, I'm hoping that the entire five hours of Steven Soderbergh's "Che" will be playing somewhere while I'm there, and hopefully WITH AN INTERMISSION. From what I've heard it's far from an objective tale, but I really wouldn't have expected it to be, and it's been far too long since I've seen Benicio del Toro on the big screen.

"The Wrestler"
The same friend who was impugning the good name of Sean Penn has already seen this Darren Aronofsky flick, and can't believe it's not playing everywhere. Especially down here, where we may not know much about movies, but we do love our wrestling. I don't see any way this one won't be fun, even if it is a bit depressing.

"Frozen River"
Seeing as this opened way back in like June, I suppose it's a long shot that it would be playing anywhere, but I'm hoping the Melissa Leo Oscar train brings it back for one more run. Immigration, by the way, has turned into the great Hollywood (if not great box office) subject that the Iraq war never became. Already this year has come Patricia Riggen's "La Misma Luna" (Under the Same Moon) and Thomas McCarthy's "The Visitor," both of which are superior to just about any of the recent war flicks, and I'm sure "Frozen River" will be fine fare to complete the set.

So, there you have it. Please, if you think of any that I might be able to catch but haven't thought of, let me know, and have a happy, happy holidays! I'm signing off until at least Jan. 2 or so, but I'm fairly certain the world will continue just fine without me. Peace out.

A Super "Office" party and a remarkable glimpse of Che

Congratulations to the Grammys, which although it did manage to nominate a slew of tired music once again did at least recognize what in my book are the album and song of the year: Lil Wayne's "Tha Carter III" (which I'm listening to right now) and MIA's "Paper Planes," respectively (actually, MIA is nominated for "record of the year" but not "song of the year," a distinction I'm sure I'll never understand.)

In TV news, Bryan Fuller's return to "Heroes" has now been confirmed for episode 20 of this season, making the already certain imminent death of "Pushing Daisies" now official. A way beyond sad day indeed, especially with the creepy-but-cool developments of last night's episode. As for "Heroes" itself, I lost interest last year then tried to come back again, but the show is just BORING. I'm sure Bryan Fuller will help, but for me it's certainly too little too late.

In much better news, "The Office" will be getting the coveted post-Super Bowl hour, and will make the most of it with what will be a hopefully just way wrong roast of Steve Carell's Michael Scott. Though there will be several celebrity drop-ins, the roast (requested by Michael, of course), will thankfully be conducted by his semiloyal employees.

And in tonight's episode, Oscar (Oscar Nunez) informs Michael that the office must spend a $4,300 surplus or lose it in next year’s budget. When Michael opens up the floor for suggestions, factions break out and officemates square off against one another in order to get what they want. Even better, Dwight (Rainn Wilson) takes Angela (Angela Kinsey) and poor Andy (Ed Helms) to Schrute Farms to work on their wedding plans (I can't wait to see that for a season finale!)

The end of the "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" season just leaves a black hole in the blackest part of my sense of humor, so here's hoping "The Office" can continue to bring the funny.

And speaking of funny, "Funny or Die" has put together a musical video retort to California's Prop 8 starring Jack Black, John C. Reilly, Allison Janney and a bunch of other stars (and even a closing number from Barney!) It's predictably preachy, but also indeed pretty friggin funny, so I decided to include it here for your Thursday enjoyment.

See more Jack Black videos at Funny or Die

And finally, since this is nominally supposed to be about movies, here's easily the coolest thing I could find this morning. At some point, the first half of Steven Soderbergh's truly ambitious Che Guevara epic starring Benicio Del Toro was to be known as "Guerilla," but it now seems that for America at least they've dumbed it down to "Che Part One." Thanks for clearing that up, guys. Either way, you can tell from this trailer that Soderbergh has something rather remarkable here, and I suspect you'll definitely be hearing Del Toro's name right next to Sean Penn's for "Milk" on Oscar night. Enjoy, and have a perfectly passable Thursday. Peace out.